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ESPN Announcer Reconfiguration Bingo

By Brian — July 10th, 2009 at 12:40 PM — 26 comments
Filed under:
  • help me it's the middle of july
  • announce teams

The mercifully Paul-Maguire-free 2009 ESPN college football announcin' teams have been announced. Of primary interest to Michigan fans are these trios locked into ABC 3:30 games:

Sean McDonough, Matt Millen, and Holly Rowe

Mike Patrick, Craig James, and Heather Cox

You will never escape the vast reach of Matt Millen, Detroit. Never.

Also the ESPN afternoon slot will probably be heavy on Michigan, so expect a goodly dose of Dave Pasch, Chris Speilman, and Bob Griese. If Michigan gets relegated to ESPN2 nooners it's Pam Ward, as per usual, and any night games (read: Iowa) will be handled by the usual Musberger-Herbstreit pairing or Brad Nessler-Todd-Blackledge-ERIN ANDREWS ERIN ANDREWS ERIN ANDREWS. Good to see Nessler and Griese finally got that surgery and can now be in different rooms—different states, even.

All of this is fine, good even. Before Matt Millen was the worst general manager in the history of professional sports—I defy anyone to contradict that statement—he was a good-to-excellent color guy. Hell, the reason he got the job with the Lions seemed to be his outstanding color commentary. It's not like he had any other qualifications whatsoever. So he and McDonough seem fine; I know some people think he's got it in for Michigan or something but that's because some people are crazy tribalists.

I'm considerably less enthused about the prospect of drawing Mike Patrick and Craig James. Patrick remains stained by his association with The Worst Football Booth Ever—Patrick, Maguire, and Joe Theismann—and seems like a guy who's still pissed off he has to work this small time rah-rah crap instead of the NFL. James, meanwhile, is a consistently smug presence in the ABC studio. Way back in the day I rated him only slightly less offensive than side-mouth-talkin' lunkhead and soon-to-be unemployed Aaron Taylor. I also find it hard to believe he can have a job analyzing college football given his role in the NCAA's Chernobyl moment at SMU.

I know nothing about Pasch. A quick google search finds an Awful Announcing post wherein he describes a portion of the ND-Hawaii bowl game a "golden shower." He sounds competent, if in serious need of an inner 13-year-old. Nice voice.

I'm an avowed fan of Spielman and Griese, two guys who tend towards wonkiness when allowed to and should work well together analyzing opposite sides of the ball. I even defended Spielman's right to call Michigan games against the good Doctor's j'accuse  in the aftermath of some impolitic comments on a Columbus radio station, because he is not Andre Ware no matter how often TV execs demand he spend more of his time on-air saying "BOOM" or "POW."

So, yeah, not perfect but the important thing: no Mark Jones, no Rod Gilmore, no Andre Ware. Hell, Ware's been relegated to Dave sidekick and will be doing Vanderbilt-Mississippi State. ESS EEE CEE, indeed.

(HT: EDSBS)

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Posted on: July 12th, 2009 at 8:10 PM #1
SyracuseWolvrine
Joined: 2008-10-20
Points: 4
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Former announcers

Am I the only one that misses Bill Curry in the broadcast booth? If nothing else, just for the entertainment value in trying to decipher what he's actually saying. I seem to remember him calling a UM-Wisco (I think it was Wisco, anyways) game, and at one point saying that "Wisconsin's gettin whipped like tied goats!) (granted, I wasn't really aware that tied goats were routinely whipped, but what do I know? I am a Northerner, after all)

Very happy that Steve Levy has given up College Football. Now if we could only get him to give up any other form of announcing.

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Posted on: July 11th, 2009 at 11:16 AM #2
mgovictors23
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Announcers

I do not like having Speilman as a announcer just because of the former buckeye thing. I hope Desmond could announce a Michigan game soon that would be awesome.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 7:59 PM #3
Ziff72
Joined: 2008-07-07
Points: 480
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Shame

It's a shame the general pop. are a bunch of dunderheads. Bob Davie turned from a great d. coordinator to a mediocre head coach to a great analyst. I'm assuming they moved him off primtime because he uh... you know... tried to actually teach you something about football instead of just yelling some crap and saying everything is "great" or so and so is the "best".

Thumbs up on Spielman, I give him credit for actually working his craft and improving. He was terrible with Pammmy at the beginning and has steadily improved. I hate the fact my favorite announcers are Buckeye, Buckeye, Domer. At least we get Papa Griese from time to time he is an adopted Wolve.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 8:08 PM #4
zlionsfan
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agreed

I remember Davie's Football 101 series from a few years ago. He had some pretty good posts before they made him stop, probably because of what you pointed out. Can't have these people learnin' and all that fancy stuff. We want people to think in ALL CAPS.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 7:06 PM #5
The Barwis Effect
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Joined: 2008-06-30
Points: 218
Online
FWIW...

...Dave Pasch worked as an update guy at WDFN back in the day, so at least he's a guy with some local ties.

iTunes pays Mike Barwis 99 cents every time he downloads a song.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 3:46 PM #6
Tha Quiet Storm
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Boo

-1 to ESPN for breaking up Nessler-Griese and Patrick-Blackledge

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 2:58 PM #7
m83econ
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Please Brian

Never again use "nooner" and "Pam Ward" in the same sentence.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 2:52 PM #8
New Kid On The Blog
Joined: 2008-07-02
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OSU School of Broadcast Arts

No Speilman! I think Desmond Howard should do as many games for OSU as Speilman does for Michigan. Then I'll be happy.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 2:31 PM #9
Duncan
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Expect a lot of...

Food comments from Millen. I seem to remember a lot of food references come up throughout the games he did on radio/TV. Then you got Blackledge and his food spot of the week.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 2:31 PM #10
Other Andrew
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Two thoughts

1) I think Isiah has at least a shot at the title over Millen for worst manager in the history of sports. I'm not saying it's clear-cut, but at least Millen didn't cost the Lions millions in sexual harassment charges (yet).

2) Craig James. Man. I never liked this guy at all. Smug is the perfect word to describe him. Worse (and I'm not sure I should be writing this on the internet, but what the hell), the least favorite e-mail I've read over the last several years was when a publisher told me that they were passing on my college football book to put one out "by" Craig James (quotes mine) that "will pretty much do the same thing this book would." Suffice to say, I can't tolerate his presence in any capacity at this point in time.

Road Games is another blog

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 2:25 PM #11
WCHBlog
Joined: 2008-12-03
Points: 2
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I'm glad we'll be getting

I'm glad we'll be getting Mike Patrick. Now that Britney is possibly going back to Judaism--probably purely for the jokes--I'll need someone to keep me updated on her during critical moments of football games.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:52 PM #12
Slappie
Joined: 2008-07-05
Points: 548
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I wish for

Stacy Dales on the sideline. She had sort of an unstable, angry woman scorned air about her.

Like she'd kill your kids rabbit.

Biz hundert azoi ve tsvantsik

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:47 PM #13
baorao
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Spielman

is great for unintentional sexual innuendo during games. Should be fun.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:41 PM #14
bigmc6000
Joined: 2009-01-12
Points: 344
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The real question...

Which would you rather have - whichever one of these pairings you feel is worse or the BTN? Personally I'll take the BTN as I think they do a not-too-bad job.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:37 PM #15
RayIsaac91
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Pasch is awful.

I am never sure if I am watching the same game as he is calling. It could be that splitting from Ware will help but I doubt it.

McDonough = the voice of death and/or Joe Buck without most of the douchiness.

But, yeah, nice that Ware, Gilmore are not to be heard.

Yeah, well, sometimes nothing can be a real cool hand.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:31 PM #16
markusr2007
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It would be cool if some new and younger voices

would be introduced to college football announcing in the next 2 years.

Griese and Spielman are good because of their competence of the game. But McDonough is so monotone, he sounds like Ted Knight introducing the freaking SuperFriends on every play.

I don't know. Is it really so difficult for behemoths like ESPN/ABC to find and pay for some quality, CFB competent voices out there?

When Carcajous Attack!
http://whencarcajousattack.blogspot.com/

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:40 PM #17
Big Boutros
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(No subject)
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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 3:01 PM #18
a2bluefan
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And here I thought I was

And here I thought I was bored at work today. +1

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:47 PM #19
Slappie
Joined: 2008-07-05
Points: 548
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beautiful

I just teared up a little.

Nicely done.

Biz hundert azoi ve tsvantsik

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:27 PM #20
baleedat
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I must be the only guy who

I must be the only guy who liked the Patrick, Maguire, and Joe Theismann booth.

IMHE

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 2:05 PM #21
MGoAero
Joined: 2009-03-16
Points: 301
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No,

No, you're not. I loved seeing Maguire doing goofy crap during breaks between quarters.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:25 PM #22
Bryan
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Points: 677
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I do not want to see "Fire

I do not want to see "Fire Millen" in Michigan Stadium. If he broadcasts any of the games the volume will be off and the radio on.

I have a Fandom Endurance III merit badge

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 1:10 PM #23
bfat
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Thank god...

we can finally hear Speilman without having to put up with robo-lez

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 12:53 PM #24
lexus larry
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Timeless!

"You will never escape the vast reach of Matt Millen, Detroit. Never."

Howeva!

The "FIRE MILLEN" sign I made for my then 10 y/o son to take to games two years ago will still apply.

(Self-deprecating side note: Several fans in our section wanted pics with the sign. You stay classy, Section 18!)

Larry

I'm not a doctor, but I play one on TV

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 12:51 PM #25
aawolve
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Joined: 2008-08-06
Points: 1415
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I'm so so happy

that Maguire will soon be gone forever from my tv. I didn't realize how freakin' old he is, thank God for mortality.

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Posted on: July 10th, 2009 at 12:47 PM #26
octal9
Joined: 2008-11-11
Points: 1892
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boooooo

Just once, I want to see Nessler, Corso, and Herbstreit do a game together. I also want to hear all of the lines that I hear whilst playing NCAA2k(number).

Only then will I be able to die having lived a fulfilling life.

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