A Different Kind Of Football Armageddon
I have terrible news: David Brandon's pimp hand has badly malfunctioned and is now marching, Godzilla-style, on the greatest rivalry ever in the history of ever. This morning he showed up on WTKA to discuss Big Ten divisons and said this:
SAM WEBB: If you are making the decision, are Michigan and Ohio State in the same division?
[pregnant pause in which Brandon struggles valiantly against the malfunctioning pimp hand's electrosteam power source. "NO," he stammers. "MUST… NOT… SUBMIT." He feels like he's trapped in an episode of Star Trek, playing Kirk in any one of the dozens of episodes in which something in his brain compels him to evil. Sweat breaks out on his brow; he begins to tremble. The shaking increases in intensity, threatening to break out into violent convulsions! At any moment David Brandon's existential dilemma will come to a head! Things are afoot—
A twitch. Two twitches. Now a facial tic. All is silent. An unnatural calm descends.]
DAVID BRANDON: …No.
[Deep in a bunker underneath a Kenosha corn field, Barry Alvarez allows himself the deep rumbling bass laugh only the blackest hearts can muster. Yes. All according to plan.]
SAM WEBB: And why? [Ed: …GOD WHY?]
THE UNSPEAKABLE THING THAT POSSESSES THE BODY OF DAVID BRANDON: Because we're in a situation where one of the best things that could happen … would be the opportunity to play Ohio State twice.
As highlighted by Doctor Saturday, Ohio State seems awfully wishy-washy about the whole thing, too:
He said he has received only a couple of e-mails from people worried about the possibility of moving the Michigan game to earlier in the season. Whether those – and other critical opinions expressed on the Internet – are reflective of the broad fan base is impossible to know, Smith said.
"I know one thing for sure - that we're going to play (Michigan) every year," Smith said. "We may end up playing the last game of the year, or not. I just don't know that yet."
The "not" scenario will only come to pass if the two teams can play again and the Big Ten is trying to avoid the farce of a best-last-one-out-of-two scenario. And with both ADs at Michigan and Ohio State trying to prepare the fans for a soft landing, it's clear which way this is going: the stupidest possible way.
ONE: It is extremely unlikely that Michigan and Ohio State would ever actually score a championship game rematch. Splitting the two teams is a pointless exercise in hoping that once every ten years you get another one. This is no longer the 1970s.
TWO: Michigan's year-end opponent: Michigan State? Boy, that will fire up everyone on Rivalry Week: "It's Michigan! It's some team that's been within a game of .500 every year since SEC schools started recruiting black kids! On ABC!"
THREE: Whatever damage the rivalry sustains because of the split is going to vastly outweigh the piddling slice of extra revenue Michigan and Ohio State will get from a 1/12th split of the incremental bump the Big Ten Championship Game gets because maybe once every ten years they'll get to pit Michigan against Ohio State.
FOUR: Dennis Dodd thinks this is the way to go. QED.
Not that this matters. Apparently it's done. Get ready for Michigan-Ohio State sometime in October, not even playing for a division or anything, because the "TV people" really want it. Do I need to remind you about Mark Shapiro?
August 20th, 2010 at 1:19 PM ^
So this would fall under "Report an Error"?
August 20th, 2010 at 1:35 PM ^
I hope EVERYONE is doing this.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:36 PM ^
[EXPLETIVE!!!!1]
August 20th, 2010 at 12:36 PM ^
EXACTLY. It: 1- upends tradition which is what differentiates college football from every other sport. 2- it ensures us the toughest schedule in the B10 every year (I'm not against a tough schedule, but not when our opponents are permanently enshrined with easier ones). 3-It ensures a mid season let down and possible loss the week after OSU. 4- the last week of season makes it the biggest game of the year because we point all season to it, earlier loses that. 5-woot, MSU/Purdue/whoever in the last game. 6- a second OSU game actually CHEAPENS the rivalry-if we win the regular season game the odds are huge that we lose the championship game, which strips the regular season game of any meaning.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:44 PM ^
Before I clicked over to Dodd's article, the first thing I thought of was "they are going to move it to Labor Day weekend." And, of course, Dodd mentioned the FSU/Miami Labor Day game.
Has anyone noticed how "successful" FSU and Miami have been lately?
The possibility of this happening has me in a state somewhat like that of the AFLAC duck after being in the barber shop with Yogi Berra.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:59 PM ^
Labor Day weekend is for some out of conference opponent. You're excited that football is back and you're excited that you're playing some BCS Team you don't normally play. This makes you forget that ultimately an early loss isn't that big of a deal and really the game isn't all that important. So you go out, thankful college FB is back, excited to see a fresh face and ignoring the fact your team is still sloppy and learning the system. It's all new and exciting so you love it.
October is the grind it out section, where you are focused on just racking up conference wins and six plus wins.
Then November is the good time. The time when you're on the cusp of winning the conference, moving into the Top 2, all of that is on the line. That's when you become rabid and it only gets that much better when your most hated rival comes to town.
Having tOSU in 80 degree weather while I'm still getting back into the groove of tailgating would just be wrong.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:44 PM ^
I just got this....ESPN_BIG TEN twitter: Mark_May is saying Denard is starting vs. UCONN
August 20th, 2010 at 12:47 PM ^
Were talking about ESPN here..
August 20th, 2010 at 12:49 PM ^
In other ESPN speculation, Les Miles is entering his third year as head coach of the Michigan Wolverines, and is he does not win, he will be fired.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:03 PM ^
His source is probably DiNardo.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:45 PM ^
they're just running the flag up the pole to see what happens; leaking a little to see what the reaction will be???? I dunno - they're has to be hope until there is no hope.
Just when it starts to look like RR is starting to understand the whole Michigan Tradition thing - they go and F UP the whole Michigan Tradition thing with this idea???!!!??? WTF.
This game - THE GAME - is f-ing everything about the GREAT MICHIGAN TRADITION.
I could give a F about what TV wants to see; about THEIR ratings; about THEIR advertising revenue; They can't even field capable broadcasters worth listening to anymore.
I need to walk away before I stroke out.
Insanity.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:45 PM ^
All,
I saw that an earlier poster suggested a petition to Brandon. I agree - so I just started one.
Please sign it and spread it around to as many people as possible. Given that action is likely to happen soon, this needs to happen ASAP if it is going to work.
http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/keepthegameattheendoftheseason/
August 20th, 2010 at 12:47 PM ^
Someone once said "Times; they are a changin'. But the world won't end. It will just change.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:05 PM ^
Seems appropriate for today ...
August 20th, 2010 at 12:49 PM ^
No, it is not the latest, redundantly-titled emo band. It is what happens when you are about to jump off a bridge, and in a swift move of diplomatic, masses-opiating mastery, David Brandon's pimp hand fastens a bungee cord to your dong. The world doesn't end as you may have wished, but what's left of your manhood is a fate worse than death.
Separate divisions, fine ... but why does that preclude keeping the The Game at the end of the season?
Brandon: "I don't think ... fans, networks, or anyone [proxies for revenue, obvs] would appreciate that matchup to be within the same 7-day period."
This shows the rationale behind the unfolding situation. But just as crucial is that he points out his is only 1 vote among 12. I'm thinking Brandon would prefer to favor Rivalry's tradition, but the rest of the B10 AD's do not share that interest (except Glenn Smith of OSU).
Fucking nihilists. Say what you will about the tenets of national socialism, Dude. At least it's an ethos!
August 20th, 2010 at 12:49 PM ^
Let me get this straight, its a done deal that Mich-OSU are going to be in separate divisions?
And if that is true there is no way they could still play the last game of the regular season?
I mean do we know this second part for sure?
It seems to me that if Michigan and OSU (the two most powerful programs in the conference) are already unwillingly agreeing to split up they should at least be able to stay as the last game.
Compromise anyone?
This is just so unbelievable that I'm not going to get upset about it until I hear final word.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:50 PM ^
this will only last for four years until the BigTen asks Cincinnati, Rutgers, Houston and Iowa State to join the conference. it will be better then, right?
August 20th, 2010 at 12:53 PM ^
What DB realy meant to say, but couldn't, is that "we want Michigan OR Ohio State in the playoff game every year". "We want to make sure one of the two biggest draws are there".
To have a strong playoff game, you want the best two teams. By having Michigan and OSU in the same division you are nearly automatically eliminating one - every year.
If in the same division, they could be 1-2 in the country (just happened a few years ago!) and the winner go on to play a meek team while the #2 is sitting home.
They want to avoid this and they also want to avoid a back-to-back game so I would expect the OSU game move to early-mid October.
Example: Florida plays Bama, LSU, MSU back to back in early October and ends with weak SC, App State, FSU.
I would expect them to set up same schedules for the Big Ten where Iowa, Neb, OSU, Michigan, Wisconsin all play each other mid-season.
Probably Michigan will end up with the MSU game last and a non-confrence and a weak team like Illinois as the last three.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:40 PM ^
It sucks, but I think you're right -- there's major downsides no matter how you slice-n-dice the conference. I personally would still prefer Michigan and OSU in the same division, but as you point out, that guarantees that only one of the Big Two can play in the conference championship, and that you'll never have a Big Two matchup in that final game.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:51 PM ^
there are three great rivalry games in college football -- Alabama-Auburn, Army-Navy and Michigan-Ohio State. (and even throw Harvard-Yale in the mix.) Each is played at the end of the year.
Great rivalries need to be played at the end of the year. There is no way around it. The Game is greatly diminished by moving it.
Kick Nebraska back to the Big 12 if this is really the result. The Nebraska fans would understand. Just ask them about Oklahoma and what expanding the Big 8 to 12 teams did to one of the great rivalries in college football.
August 20th, 2010 at 2:06 PM ^
there also used to be no BCS, always Pac 10 - Big 10 rose bowl (a really great tradition I miss), actually 10 teams in the big ten (not 11 or 12), no instant replay, no confrence championships, no bowl sponsor games (like Tostitos Sun Chip and Dip Gasbag Bowl- I loved the old names: Cotton, Sugar, Rose, Gator, etc), bowl games on new Years only.
Such is "progress".
August 20th, 2010 at 2:24 PM ^
for the rivalry to really have meaning, the Game needs to be important, for the stakes of the Game to really matter. If the Game is moved up, it is just a step along the path to a conference championship. At the end of the season, The Game derails one team (generally) and anoints the other. At midseason, it is just another game that adds to the records, nothing is decided.
Even if both teams are in the same division, it will generally end the season of the loser and place the winner in the championship game. It will remain decisive. That can't happen in October.
And claiming "progress" as an excuse for things to fall apart is for those who easily throw in the towel and don't fight for things that are important. And if I am to continue to purchase season tickets and follow this program, this is the very definition of important.
I've already sent me email to the AD. I suggest more of us do the same.
August 21st, 2010 at 4:04 PM ^
but what city is the "Dip Gasbag Bowl" played in?
August 20th, 2010 at 4:17 PM ^
Just ask them about Oklahoma and what expanding the Big 8 to 12 teams did to one of the great rivalries in college football.
Nebraska fan here, and you're dead on. This wouldn't be as bad as our situation was, since we ended up not even playing OU every year - it ended up being part of the regular two years on, two years off rotation of opponents from the other division. However, that gap, coupled with our Callahan-enhanced tumble into mediocrity, killed one of the great rivalries in college football.
I'm honestly overjoyed that my Huskers are joining the Big 10, and while I'm sad that we won't probably get Oklahoma as a non-conference opponent very often (if ever), the fact that I'm already over it tells you something about the damage done by not doing everything possible to preserve the big rivalries when setting up the new conference.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:51 PM ^
will just prove the saying "Money is the root of all evil".
August 20th, 2010 at 1:03 PM ^
the saying is actually "the love of money is the root of all evil", but i think it still applies here.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:58 PM ^
This is absolutely horrible, how can the Ohio State game not be the last game of the year? You have to be kidding me. Making Michigan State the last game of the season is even worse. Michigan Ohio State is always the most hyped up game at the end of the season and makes each teams season with a win.
August 20th, 2010 at 12:59 PM ^
There's a distinct possibility that this is a PR trial balloon and Brandon and Co. are trying to gauge public reaction. I'm going to call the U of M athletic Dept. and let them know what I think. Maybe it'll help, maybe it won't. One thing's for sure, it can't hurt and I think its worth the effort to save the greatest rivalry in sports.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:02 PM ^
I can't wait to see our guys bust out the maize jerseys for the first time, against OSU on 10/22/11!
August 20th, 2010 at 1:04 PM ^
muppet killer.
We need MS Paint of this.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:05 PM ^
is this some sort of revenge of the historical little 8, a way for the purdue and michigan states of the conference to chop down on the two standard bearers and money makers? does taking away the most storied rivalry game in the history of sports from two of your competitors make your situation a little better?
discuss
August 20th, 2010 at 8:28 PM ^
Every MSU fan I've talked to about division alignments seems in full agreement that straight E-W is obviously the most logical way to do it.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:07 PM ^
I will believe this is the new setup when they announce it. Right now, it feels like the ADs are putting the feelers out to see just how angry people would be. My guess is that once the screaming dies down, the sides will realize that playing at the end of the year makes the most sense in terms of exposure, even if it occassionally leads to a rematch a week later, and will keep the game where it should be. I do agree, though, that keeping UM and OSU in different divisions would make some sense, since otherwise you'd have the Big 12 problem of Texas and OU battling it out for national prominence and the North division trotting out Kansas to be destroyed in the championship game. If we are going to have a championship game, it might as well have the best possibility of a good matchup.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:21 PM ^
Iowa, Nebraska, and Wisconsin are hardly Kansas.
So what if Michigan has to beat OSU to get to the conference championship game. I wouldn't have it any other way myself.
August 20th, 2010 at 5:13 PM ^
But from a position of national prominence, only Nebraska would draw the number of eyeballs advertisers would like to see for the conference championship games. This decision has nothing to do with football - conference championships have been decided for generations using unbalanced schedules and nobody complained because, by and large, the best team usually won or, at worse, came in second to a nearly-equal team. The championship game is all about money, and what killed the Big 12 game was that rarely were the two teams of the same national caliber. Usually is was one of the South division teams competing for a MNC and the North division trying to go 8-4.
August 20th, 2010 at 8:33 PM ^
Geography is forever (or at least until the New Madrid fault goes berserk).
Keep in mind, in the early days of the Big XII it was Nebraska, Colorado, and K-State that were the powerhouses and the South division, while not the bunch of patsies the North was in the mid-2000s, was clearly the weaker of the two.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:10 PM ^
anything but MSU at the end of the season. I would much rather play for the Jug in the final week. DB did say that UM-OSU would still play late in the year. I hope that means November.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:30 PM ^
How many classic games have Michigan and Michigan State played in the last two decades? While Michigan v. OSU is the better rivalry, Michigan v. Michigan State is often the better game. 90, 95, 97, 99, 01, 03, 04, 05, 07, 09, all classics. If we can't finish with Ohio State, why not Michigan State?
August 20th, 2010 at 3:49 PM ^
I can't support any system that has us playing the Spartans in the last game of the regular season.
August 20th, 2010 at 5:22 PM ^
Beating MSU is not much more than a feeling of relief. We are supposed to beat them. I bet MSU would love this opportunity as it would seem to falsely elevate the appeal of the rivalry on a national level. At least the Battle for the Little Brown Jug is historic. It's the oldest trophy and would be more appropriate for rivalry weak.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:10 PM ^
August 20th, 2010 at 7:05 PM ^
And for that off-chance of a rematch, you're willing to have the Game's importance diluted every year? Even if years of a rematch, it would just mean that the first game resolved nothing.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:10 PM ^
This is for DAVID BRANDON! Anything other than M-OSU as the last game of the Big 10 season in late November each and every year is totally unacceptable and DESTROYS what differentiates college football from all other forms of sport. If you allow us to lose this, your legacy as AD will be as the anti-christ of Michigan football, just as Don Canham is seen as its savior. Bo is spinning in his grave just at the thought of it. There is change and there is change. Hitler ascending to power in Nazi Germany was change, and it was NOT good. Neither is M-OSU in the middle of the season or not every year.
August 20th, 2010 at 2:00 PM ^
Dude, you played the Nazi card? Sensible argument FAIL
August 20th, 2010 at 2:20 PM ^
Godwin'd!
August 20th, 2010 at 1:13 PM ^
to have any kind of negative effect on the rivalry, I don't. The hatred between Michigan and Ohio State is bigger than any scheduling issue, and I really think seeing this game at different points in the season will actually be really interesting. Things are changing in the Big Ten, and even more so for Michigan in particular. We have a f#%king night game next year for crying out loud. All signs point to playing Bama in the Dallas MegaDome in 2012. I guess with all that is changing, I don't find this particularly devastating. A cool fall breeze, an 8:00 PM start for Michigan-Ohio State at the Big House. The prospect of sweet bloody revenge in a month or so if we lose.
Here goes nothing, I like it.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:34 PM ^
Is nothing sacred?!
August 20th, 2010 at 1:38 PM ^
I have wanted that game at 3:30 for years.
August 20th, 2010 at 1:40 PM ^
Maybe they will move it to Thursday Night!
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