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Dear Diary, Two-Man QB Depth Charts are Really Spooky!

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By Seth — November 2nd, 2012 at 8:53 AM — 18 comments
Filed under:
  • 2003 minnesota
  • 2012 minnesota
  • 2012 nebraska
  • crisler
  • dear diary
  • drew henson
  • funny bone injuries are not humerus
  • kittens
  • little brown jug
  • tom brady

Can you guess what was wrong with Herb? Also the copyright to this at the end says "U.M.&M."

Of all the things to despise about the new divisions—like the MSU game being technically more important every year than Ohio State—at least let's admit there's one wonderful benefit: Michigan-Minnesota is back to every year.

The historians like this one because there were some major powers with some major players who went on or ended some major streaks back in the day. But with more than enough annual powers on the schedule these days, I kind of like having this one historically poignant yet presently non-stressful mid-year contest with the people who invented cooking the cheese inside the actual hamburger.

After yet another Hallow's Eve scare, a nice jug of hot cider and Minnesota's safeties are just the thing. Alas, it is not Jug Saturday yet, and there's some things from last week that we need to over again. Like what happens when you lose your 5-star quarterback?

DON'T MISS THESE:

You Get This One Chance. Why is it every time we've got like THE MAN under center, the minute he goes out it's terror central? Not just Denard against Nebraska but the crater drewhensonwhen Mallett departed, or the black hole that formed when Henne's arm was removed from its socket against Oregon in 2007, or the feeling in the pit of your stomach when that Buckeye Steinbrenner bought off Drew Henson (right). Enter oakapple, who goes back through recent history to show how the uber recruit tends to both work out and scare off competition. Whyfore wast thou oppos'd to class, bygone son of Forcier?

He hits on some good questions—like the handling of Gardner. But if he looked back further, to the deep recruiting of the time after Bo, he might have seen a different magic.

Gameboy went back over Michigan's 2012 opponents past to pull up percentages for how much better our defense fared against them than their average opponents. Michigan got blown out by Alabama about exactly the same way everyone else did, and we beat UMass the same way everyone else beat on UMass. As for the rest, the defensive performances have one other outlier in Air Force (we did marginally better than Mountain West teams) and otherwise stand as "omigod that was a tough defense" in the memories of everyone else. I fixed his charts to make them more legible so the descriptions may be a bit off.

[After the jump, more spooky things]

THE WEEKLIES:

FTMLT

wallpaper by Ames

Oil and Water. Put off by the hurricane, best and worse with bronxblue has a Gardner e-pinion, expectations, and compares receiver charts.

Inside the Box Score has joined the ranks of people who use Brian's bolded subconscious writing device. By the way, negged for giving a stupid nickname to Bellomy—his arm strength and accuracy when facing blitzing blackshirts at night as a freshman are all fair game, but I'm gonna be a tightwad with people who step over that line. And not just because a very large man on two-person bicycle has been riding around town looking for someone who fits my description.

Statistics and FEI projection still say the offense is bad—like 56th in the country. Since I can't convince humans that Denard getting hurt killed the radio star, I'm not going to even try yelling it at machines. Defense is 20th. These charts say so much:

image_8_25image_10_22

The turnover analysis is also mad at us, and by the way freshman QBs are one of the few things you can't just be like "bah it's all luck" with these things.

Big Etc. The Blockhams has a new feature where the author draws a solemn black and white comic, forces certain people to give him captions for it, then colors it all bright and with happy facial features that don't at all match the somber fall mood fit for an intellectual foray into the genius of cube engineering. Apparently everything they say about how nice people are at Nebraska is completely true. Also true: way too much advertising in that stadium. Interesting discussion on replacing the seniors from the 2012 D. The Michigan schedule as zombie apocalypse using some game I've never heard of. Baseball hellos. And we killed THE_KNOWLEDGE.

.

yes.

Best of the Board

THE AFTERMATH OF FUNNY BONES THAT AREN'T AT ALL FUNNY

cute-kitty-frog-costumeomigod he's a frog!

The loss maybe was expected, but the manner of it was not. There was a vent thread that got just the right amount of out of hand without managing to make This Week in Schadenfreude. Then there were kittehs. A whole thread of kittehs. Wait no, TWO threads of kittehs! Then someone ruined the kitteh-fest by putting a Detroit Tiger trying to swing a bat in there. I was like what, and then I cried.

WHENCE THE KNEELS OF YESTERYEAR?

I clicked on another thread about stats, because stats are numbers not sad things, right? Well no not really because this from GhostofYost

With two returning 1000-yard rushers including a record-setting QB, a former near-1000-yard receiver, and an experienced OL with a top 20 pick at LT, this offense just did something that hasn't been done at Michigan in 50 years.

The last team to be held without a TD three times in one season was the 2-7, 1962 squad quarterbacked by Bobby Timberlake.  They were shut out 4 times, and scored more than 14 points just once.

HE DID IT!

Remember when Wolverine Devotee sent in his idea for Crisler banners and we were all YES PLEASE? Well…

NCAAChampionshipbannerA-1

Concept^                                  Final version^               

We zoom:

zoomNCAAChampionshipbanner

ZOLTAN MESKO AND TIM NORTH: HEROES OF THE GALAXY OF SPACE

His charity is only a month old and Zoltan is already getting accolades in an Earth zone known as Boston for his immediate success at charity. Tim North (he was Nate Brink before it was cool) is doing a lot of the legwork. Look for more about this thing from us in the future.

I'M IN THE BUBBLE!!!

Had to do this when attending a Tigers game and Michigan was playing. Respect the bubble, people. If you need to text your friends during a sporting event and you know they're watching it at home, always ask if they're bubbled first.

Your Moment of Zen:

An dreary Friday night until screens and delayed handoffs and a ball that touched the moon before it came to Braylon, and there was no hesitation before going for it on 4th down. Part 1 has the transcontinental and nothing else you want to see.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 9:14 AM
#2
One Armed Bandit
Joined: 12/23/2010
MGoPoints: 1929
Purdue AND Minnesota

were ranked in 2003? What sorcery is this?

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November 2nd, 2012 at 9:56 AM
(Reply to #2) #3
MichFan1997
MichFan1997's picture
Joined: 08/04/2008
MGoPoints: 10339
back in my day

We walked to school uphill...wait wrong story. Back in my day, purdue churned out NFL quarterbacks and minisoda had 2 NFL backs in the same backfield

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November 2nd, 2012 at 9:38 AM
#4
BostonWolverine
BostonWolverine's picture
Joined: 11/13/2008
MGoPoints: 6557
God, those Michigan screen

God, those Michigan screen passes were deadly.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 10:00 AM
#5
lager86
lager86's picture
Joined: 01/30/2009
MGoPoints: 242
amazing what can happen when players actually catch the ball

nm

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November 2nd, 2012 at 10:17 AM
#6
Engin77
Joined: 07/02/2008
MGoPoints: 4128
U M & M

was an amalgamation of three earlier animation companies. link

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November 2nd, 2012 at 11:13 AM
#7
profitgoblue
profitgoblue's picture
Joined: 09/01/2009
MGoPoints: 19557
Take THAT corporate

Take THAT corporate firewall!  Your failure to block YouTube has resulted in the loss of 10 minutes of productivity from one of your sometimes-productive employees!  Put that in your pipe and smoke it!

Also, check out the frames at around 9:12, 9:50, and again around 10:15 . . . Is that a partial smile on your face, Lloyd?  Lloyd?  Well, is it?

 

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November 2nd, 2012 at 11:26 AM
(Reply to #7) #8
wolfman81
wolfman81's picture
Joined: 12/17/2008
MGoPoints: 1337
Only 10 minutes

That's pretty good man!

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November 2nd, 2012 at 1:46 PM
(Reply to #7) #9
Don
Don's picture
Joined: 06/30/2008
MGoPoints: 70408
Is that a partial smile on your face, Lloyd?

That's a cat-that-ate-the-canary smile... contrasting wonderfully with the befuddled agony on Mason's puss.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 11:15 AM
#10
Saluki
Saluki's picture
Joined: 11/04/2008
MGoPoints: 42
If only there had been

an all name team back when M Football had Opong-Owusu.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 11:40 AM
#11
kevin holt
kevin holt's picture
Joined: 03/16/2010
MGoPoints: 16959
Note to Seth:

Wherefore actually means "why". So you didn't have to change it to whyfore. Juliet wasn't wondering where Romeo was, she was lamenting that he was a Montague.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 11:59 AM
#12
Yo_Blue
Yo_Blue's picture
Joined: 08/24/2010
MGoPoints: 83181
Remember it well

My kids and I were on a Scout event spending the night at Greenfield Village. I left the Village and drove to a Dearborn bar to watch the game.  The first three quarters were so bad I considered leaving, but given the fact that I NEVER leave early, I stuck it out.    I was glad I did - John Navarre was on fire in the fourth quarter.

When I got back to GV the gates were closed and there was no one in sight.  I ended up climbing the fence to get back to the campground.

I know, I know, cool story, Bro.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 12:25 PM
(Reply to #11) #13
Seth
Seth's picture
Joined: 10/14/2008
MGoPoints: 94461
My friends were all in a band

My friends were all in a band that was playing at the I-Rock, and the weather was terrible and literally nobody was there but the girlfriends, which was not something that ever happened with this band since it formed. Since there's no TVs in there, I was running outside to the sound guy's van to listen on the radio, and running in to announce the score.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 12:17 PM
#14
Yeoman
Joined: 06/08/2011
MGoPoints: 13242
Amazing.

A two-year-old post gets a mention on "Dear Diary" and the only reason it came to light is because a spammer bumped it.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 12:27 PM
(Reply to #12) #15
Seth
Seth's picture
Joined: 10/14/2008
MGoPoints: 94461
I kinda don't mind when they

I kinda don't mind when they do that. We catch them quickly, and the misery we bring to them is pretty nasty (let's just say they're going to be hearing a lot about purple pills). And I'm srs about the bubble.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 3:07 PM
(Reply to #14) #16
Yeoman
Joined: 06/08/2011
MGoPoints: 13242
I don't mind at all--I think

I don't mind at all--I think the spammers do good work around here, rummaging up treasures we'd never remember otherwise.

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November 2nd, 2012 at 12:28 PM
#17
MadMonkey
MadMonkey's picture
Joined: 04/08/2010
MGoPoints: 5117
I thought you were kidding about the copyright. But, it

clearly states U.M. & M.  Interesting

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November 2nd, 2012 at 2:47 PM
#18
ST3
ST3's picture
Joined: 09/11/2010
MGoPoints: 31853
Technically speaking,

the nickname was given to the Bellomy to Funchess combination, and it wasn't meant to denigrate Bellomy. I mean, seriously, what is more satisfying than a good, hearty belch after a big meal? In some cultures, that's actually a sign of respect to the cook.

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November 7th, 2012 at 10:37 PM
#19
rmic2
Joined: 07/18/2011
MGoPoints: 345
ESPN bottom line

In the first minute of the clip, Glen Rice signs a new contract.

In the 6th minute of the clip, Clarett files lawsuit.

Memories....

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