By now, ABC has gone to covering the dismantling of Dantonio's team, but the focus is still on inflicting as much pain on Michigan fans as inhumanly possible.
The ticker at the bottom of the screen tells the story thus: Michigan has lost to MSU, ND and OSU for the 2nd time ever in a season. OSU has won the game 5 years in a row. Ohio had 400 yards.
Pause for review of MSU's season. They beat Michigan. Back to you, Steve.
At halftime, we'll go to Craig James, with a retrospective on how bad Michigan sucks.
This is going to be the message all winter. Even for those of us who knew this was coming, knew this was part of rebuilding a program from scratch, it won't make it any easier.
We won't be suffering alone. Because we're Michigan, there's going to be a long line of kids we've beaten up for a century waiting for a their taste of blue tears. If you thought that Buckeye and the hundred Spartans in your life would leave you in solemn grief, you haven't met a Spartan or a Buckeye.
Now is the time for coping mechanisms. If you have the ability to cry, take this opportunity to lock yourself in a closet with your favorite Sheridan throwing chart and let it all out. If you're more Type A, head to the gym and repeat "3 AND 9" until you break your max rate.
Or if you're like me, find the woman you love, sit her down, and see how long you can try to explain why this losing won't be permanent before her level of really not caring or understanding what the hell you're talking about overpowers her concern for your mental health.
But however you deal, remember one thing:
I promise, next year will be better than this.