"being a guy, i dont really care about fashion, so they could play in pink tutus for all i care"
Adidas is totally going to call this bluff. FFFFFFFUUUUUUUU--
at least it's not just us?
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On Being An Old Man With A Precious Lawn
Filed under:
Tomorrow at 8 PM Adidas and Michigan and Notre Dame will have an under-the-lights unveiling of the uniforms both will wear when the first night game in Michigan Stadium history goes down. That's odd: marketing 101 is "when you have bad news, release it on Friday at 5 PM." Michigan is treating their great unveiling like they're firing their coach for massive NCAA violations.
On the other hand, maybe it's not so odd. Yesterday the M-Den momentarily posted what looked like the official thing:
If that's what you're deploying, 8 PM isn't late enough. Broadcast the announcement from the Chinese factory where they'll be made at 4 AM Eastern.
The M-Den twitter feed later posted a three-part item expressing regret for the "mistake" that obviously failed to address whether or not those were the real McCoy. They likely are. Tom pointed out the close-up teaser image has the exact same M the mistakenly posted jersey does. If they're different, they're not much different.
Tomorrow we'll enter the ranks of schools that dress up like clowns for a little bit of money from a shoe company. Notre Dame will as well. I'll make some sarcastic comments, privately think anyone I see wearing one of the jerseys is a total sellout, and move on. This September we'll watch Clownz Faceoff 2011 and life will go on. It's not really a big deal. Everyone does it, and traditionalists sigh, and recruits say they're excited.
So why does this make me want to buy a shotgun, rocking chair, and lifetime supply of lawn fertilizer?
Well, there was a way to do this that would not give people hives. It did not require the assistance of a crack team of uniform designers, and it didn't have stripes conjured from one of their fever-dreams.
The numbers on the helmets (and the different wing pattern on them), block Ms on the socks and shoulders, and overall retro stylings of the mid-60s (like gray face-masks) would have provided a distinctive, historically accurate look. (Doctor Saturday pointed out that it would have been a look from an era when Michigan and Notre Dame were in one of their periodic snits, but whatever.)
It wouldn't have been much different. It would have been cool, though:
It would have been a genuine callback to another era of Michigan football. They could have brought out some former players, celebrated a Rose Bowl win, whatever. If they're going to do that in the Franken-uniforms they'll have to bring out a nighmarish assemblage of Horace Prettyman's arms and shoulders stapled to Bill Yearby's torso and head; the lower body will be a cyborg entity from 2211 that shoots postgame celebration laserz. The legs will stop at the knees because bony undead horror robots of 2211 come hovering or they don't come at all.
This bothers me because it makes it obvious that honoring the program's past doesn't crack the top several reasons they'll put the stripes on this fall, falling behind at least "money," "making Adidas happy," and "allowing Dave Brandon to 'create the future'." My money teat is easy to milk, but not that easy. I won't put on a Big Chill shirt with an Arby's logo on it and I'm not buying whatever that is above.
This makes me an old man but it also strikes me how stupid the corporate culture Dave Brandon comes from is. At a consumer-facing, mid-sized, publicly-traded corporation it's all about three months from now when you report your numbers and the stock price goes up or down and you're a hero or an idiot. Once companies go public they slowly lose the distinctive characteristics that made them successful in the first place and become a collection of generic suits*. The suits get paid exorbitant amounts of money to trade long-term goodwill for numbers that will allow another set of suits to increase the exorbitant amount of money they are getting paid.
The best example of how this doesn't have to happen is privately-owned Chik-Fil-A, which is still closed every Sunday for religious reasons and is so loved by Southerners that when the corporation bought the naming rights to the Peach Bowl it was generally regarded as an improvement. These are correlated factors.
These days a lot of tech companies are remaining private longer than they would have in the past—Facebook is the best example—in order to avoid the relentless make-your-numbers effect of being a public company. It seems like Michigan is announcing its IPO Friday night.
*[Once you get to the behemoth side of the scale you can maintain identity via monopoly: Google and Apple are distinctive entities that appear to have ethoses (ethii?) other than making money hand over fist; they can probably have these because they are making money hand over fist.]
(HT on the 60s uniform picks to "cutter," denizen of Michigan messageboards everywhere.)
June 9th, 2011 at 1:10 PM
#102
You've doomed us all.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:06 PM
#103
Cynical Brian
What the uniforms look like to Brian Cook:
June 9th, 2011 at 1:28 PM
#104
Ref to last night's South
Ref to last night's South Park, wherein everything starts look (literally) like dookie.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:07 PM
#107
Is there anything this
Is there anything this fanbase won't complain about? Angelique Chengelis reported yesterday that the players liked the design, shouldn't that be important to us? Also, recruits are always eating up how Oregon has so many uniforms-those are f***** ugly-so who cares just accept it.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:13 PM
#108
Accept yourself
Don't tell me what to accept. Its great that the players like them. However, they aren't shelling out hundreds of dollars every year on tickets and clothing. A sh-tty design is a sh-tty design, regardless of how much the fan base complaints or not. Its a sh-tty design and is going to look stupid. Its a shame and its all corporate mentality driven, just like Brian points out. Its a sell-out and its sad.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:54 PM
#109
Your right they aren't
Your right they aren't shelling out hundreds of dollars on tickets, they are dedicating hundreds of hours of their lives instead...hmmm..And its BS that we say the design is corporate mentality based-if the design was solely created to make money they would have designed the most radical yet LOVED design so every single fan had to own it.
June 9th, 2011 at 3:24 PM
#110
Are they requiring you to buy
Are they requiring you to buy a jersey? Are you somehow not getting a hundred dollars worth of entertainment when you buy a ticket because of the jerseys they wear? If its ugly, the accounting will show, but I don't see why people feel like they are losing financially with these new jerseys.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:15 PM
#111
That's cool and all, but how
That's cool and all, but how do you explain Penn State still remaining successful with uniforms that haven't changed since about 1902 and a coach who was around to implement them? In fact, PSU's uniforms got even plainer for this season with the removal of the trim.
The claim that we need to do stuff like this to "attract recruits" and such, to enter into the Oregon arms race, is just silly. We're Michigan. We don't have Phil Knight in a box at Autzen listening to the playcalls on a headset, diagramming plays for his guests on a dry erase board. Plenty of schools do just fine without crazy WR gloves and space-age everything.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:24 PM
#112
Really, Penn State got rid of
Really, Penn State got rid of the trim? That's a rather radical change, all things considered.
To add to your point, plenty of great players are also lining up to play for Nick Saban and his boring old-school uniforms.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:30 PM
#113
http://pennstatermag.files.wo
http://pennstatermag.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/dsc_0234.jpg
Turns out the trim was only introduced because there were questions of whether they could get the trim in the exact same color as the rest of the jersey, as the trim was a different fabric and necessary for the way in which the jerseys were designed. They've since found they can do without the trim with advancements in fabric and design, so when given the option, PSU decided to ditch the trim.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:42 PM
#114
Wow. It's been like 30 years
Wow. It's been like 30 years with that design. Seems to me that the trim became the new "traditional look."
June 9th, 2011 at 1:27 PM
#115
Lots of reasons
Good coaching, tradition, consistency, etc. The lack of innovation itself makes them stick out, fashion wise.
Its not that fashion decides things, its that it can be a factor. Oregon's rise is unquestionably in part due to the fashion that most (older) fans hate, but many (younger) fans love.
Oregon and PSU stand out on opposite sides of the spectrum. Michigan has obviously been more toward the PSU side and has the iconic helmets, but as long as they keep those, I don't think any damage is done perceptions.
I'll get off your lawn now.
June 9th, 2011 at 2:36 PM
#116
Of course, the only
Of course, the only traditional thing about PSU is its uniforms. The Beaver Stadium experience is NFL-lite. PSU now plays the Zombie Nation song after TDs.
June 9th, 2011 at 2:41 PM
#117
Thanks for the advice
Bobby Knight.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:12 PM
#118
Not really a big deal
Things change, this is just one thing changing for 1 game
The entire idea of a night game is crazy to old timers anyway, so why not double dip with a wacked out jersey
Its not the nickname, its not the fight song, its not the helmet, its just some goofy stuff on the arms
June 9th, 2011 at 1:30 PM
#119
THIS.
If youre for the
THIS.
If youre for the night game, you cant really complain about this IMO. "Toe meets leather at noon". I dont recall Bo saying anything about uniforms.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:55 PM
#120
That makes zero sense
People aren't pissed about the uniform change simply because the current look is the way we've always done things (or because they just don't like staying up late). Playing at night is about making your product (to use Brandon-speak) available to a wider audience (you're just going to reach more viewers in primetime). It is the same reason we played during the day for decades (most people can't see in the dark).
Tinkering with some of the best uniforms in college football (Notre Dame is equally ridiculous for doing this) is about changing the product itself, a product loaded with meaning/identity/history for countless people. If Zingermann's opens a new location, that is a positive (or at least not a negative to anyone who isn't just bitching for the sake of bitching about the good old days). If they start selling McDonald's-quality burgers instead of their current fare, then people are (justifiably) going to be upset about it. The fact that these fashion abortions would make a dirty Big Mac look delicious only exacerbates the problem.
June 9th, 2011 at 2:51 PM
#121
zingermans - mcdonalds
to take your example
if we can't stop the pass in awesome uniforms it doesn't matter if we can't stop the pass in good uniforms
What if the devil made you a deal. UofM wears these uniforms all season long and they win a MNC?
would you take it?
June 10th, 2011 at 8:45 AM
#122
Or how about
If they wear these uniforms and everyone here gets paid a million dollars? Of course we'd take it. But there's no correlation in either case. Are you trying to say we're a bunch of prostitutes and are simply haggling over price?
June 9th, 2011 at 1:14 PM
#123
ask the people at the Ipad factory where the spate of suicides
occurred about whatever virtue Apple retains by remaining private (to work there you now have to sign a promise you won't commit suicide); ask the kids picking up cancer as they pick through piles of discarded computer parts in various parts of Africa and India; ask those of us who suffered through two bouts of rampant motherboard failure with early maclappies (why we're not mcslappies); or--hell--ask Linus Torvalds, who says that when he met Steve Jobs the guy had no interest whatever in talking computing, programming, or innovation, just sales figures (Torvalds' conclusion--he's a flapping idiot).
This is about as cranky--and self-contradictory--as Brian gets. (Why were you happy when a corporate CEO was installed in the first place? That was the time to piss and moan, not when--predictably--he does what CEOs do.)
The Adidas design is much nicer than the utterly generic unis in the photos. Denard is gonna make it shine.
I will buy Brian on a lot of fronts but as fashion maven--not.
June 9th, 2011 at 6:34 PM
#124
Apple isn't private
It's a publicly traded company. Symbol: AAPL
June 9th, 2011 at 8:31 PM
#125
and Foxconn
suicide rates are actually below the general population rates as noted here. When you have more employees than the population of Detroit, and you even provide the towns for the employees to live in, then you're likely to have all stories and problems that population can generate. I believe this is the company that you're trying to talk about with the "will not off oneself pledge" and yes, they are the contract manufacturer for some of Apple's most popular products, but they are not AAPL. Foxconn is secretive, but it is not a private company, traded on the Hong Kong and Taiwan exchanges. Not trying to let them off for some of their business practices and how they treat employees, but they really don't fit the example here.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:17 PM
#126
The case for a patch
Michigan is supposed to be different, but all too often we are the same. Like we need money to fuel good things, including expanding our number of varsity sports to include lacrosse. New revenue streams, like selling special jerseys, are helpful to that end. That means is not eggregious in and of itself. However, in this particular case, the execution is hideous.
We will forever wish to have celebrated this event in our traditional uniforms, with perhaps a tasteful and discrete commemorative patch, a la the 100th game vs tsio. That would have been cool. People would buy those and wear them proudly. If they sold jerseys with 100th game patches now, people would buy them.
Why is this not a win-win? Why wouldn't his make the athletic dept., adidas, and the fans all happy?
Kids are welcome to run on my lawn, but not to take a dump on it!
June 9th, 2011 at 1:18 PM
#127
So Brian
Do you like 'em?
June 9th, 2011 at 2:43 PM
#128
The question is
When is legoman going to sport one?
June 9th, 2011 at 1:18 PM
#129
At least the facemasks are gray
June 9th, 2011 at 1:22 PM
#130
Thanks for the shout out . . .
Thanks for the shout out, Brian. I largely agree with everything you have to say about not only the throwback jerseys, but also about some of the less then enviable workings of corporations everywhere.
I think one of the problems here is that there's a difference between a throwback uniform and a throwback jersey. The uniform includes everything from head to toe and as Brian points out, there were some distinctive features on the mid-60s uniform that would have made it a throwback to the teams of that era.
The problem is that you can't readily sell that entire look unless there's a major market out there for white socks with block M's on them or mini-helmets with numbers on them. The main item that Michigan, Adidas and M-Den will sell will be the jerseys and they have to look distinctive enough for the common fan (or more specifically, the demographic that buys these things) to be interested in purchasing. Quite frankly, a simple blue jersey with number on the front and back and no name probably doesn't meet that objective. Maybe adding a block M on the sleeves would do it, but that's evidentally not the direction the Athletic Department is going at this time.
I think that's unfortunate because one of the major marketing points about Michigan is tradition coupled with innovation. We certainly see that in the stadium renovations, and for those responsible for it (including David Brandon), I say congratulations--well done. But these uniforms--which look like a composite of a late 19th century look coupled with a varsity football "M" sweater--misses on both counts. While I will withhold final judgement until we actually see the entire "look" unveiled tomorrow, right now I have to say that they don't look very appealing.
When properly done, throwback uniforms can be pretty neat, but there's always an urge to tamper with what's classically good. I thought it would present a pretty fun (and easily marketable) narrative for both Michigan and Notre Dame to play this first night game in Ann Arbor in replica uniforms from the 60s--certainly both team's helmets would be different looking (different wings and numbers for Michigan, shamrock for Notre Dame). It appears to me that U-M is going in a different direction with this.
One final thought. David Brandon did say words to the effect that the version of the uniform first provided in the Detroit Free Press was inaccurate. In actuality, they do have a lot more in common than Brandon might have led us to think--and that's unfortunate on his part. By and large, I've agreed with most of the things he's done during his tenure and I applaude him for the way he handled the NCAA investigation into Michigan's football program (if you want to see how not to do it, cast your eyes to Columbus, Ohio). Later this month, he'll be publicly presenting the FY 2012 UM Athletic Department budget and he's stated in the papers that he'll be putting together a long-term strategic plan to grow Michigan athletics. It's a big responsibility and I wish hiim well on it. My only point is this--there's no need to get cute about some things, and that includes the throwbacks. When all else fails, go back to what works best--that's why UM hired Brady Hoke, isn't it?
June 9th, 2011 at 1:22 PM
#131
I like em
I shall buy one. Might get laid in it, too.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:34 PM
#132
Chick-fil-A
I'll take a #1 with Chick-Fil-A sauce over that sh-tty "throwback" jersey every day.
P.S. I suspect that those of you that know what I mean likely agree whole-heartedly.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:44 PM
#133
Did you know that the...
...Chick-Fil-A sauce was not developed by Chick-Fil-A corporate, but by a local franchisee in Fredericksburg, VA and that up until a few years ago, you couldn't get that sauce in every Chick-Fil-A location?
The sauce was an innovation and a break from the traditional condiments that were available at most restaurants.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:46 PM
#134
Amen to that, brother
If you put Chick-Fil-A sauce on the Geico gecko (sitting just to the left as I type this), I'd eat the little green punk alive.
June 9th, 2011 at 2:03 PM
#135
Amen. Chick-fil-a is one of the few positives of traveling to the south. I've never had the sauce though, I haven't been near a CFA in a few years though....
June 9th, 2011 at 2:03 PM
#136
Amen. Chick-fil-a is one of the few positives of traveling to the south. I've never had the sauce though, I haven't been near a CFA in a few years though....
June 9th, 2011 at 1:35 PM
#137
Meh
I don't think the throwbacks (or retros, if you prefer) are great, but I also don't share in the wailing and gnashing of teeth over them. Despite their apparent disconnection with Michigan history and their rugby styling, my Michigan degrees are not going to burst into flames because of them, nor are they going to cause people to point and laugh when I wear the rest of my Michigan gear. The brand and the tradition extend far beyond what the team wears for any one game (or say, our record over the last three seasons).
If you hate the jerseys, don't buy one. Flood DB's inbox with complaints. That is your right as fans and alumni. Since the concern is that DB is too corporate, do your part to make sure that the ROI on this project is underwhelming. At the same time, if people snap up the jerseys like crazy, and the recruits love them, then maybe we have to accept that not everybody shares our sense of nostalgia.
Just out of curiosity, did any of the get off my lawn folks ever own one of those starter jackets with 15 different Michigan logos on them?
June 9th, 2011 at 1:41 PM
#138
For your...
...consideration, history buffs/tradition mavens:
1884 Team Photo (stripes!!!):
1889 team photo (stripes!!!): 
1890 Team Photo (some stripes!!!):
1918 Team Photo (stripes on sleeves!!!):
1920 team photo (stripes on sleeves!!!):
The team sported this jersey from 1918 - 1920.
So, to say that this is unprecedented is simply inaccurate. People who bemoan that the "UTL" jerseys hearken back to rugby or soccer uniforms are willfully or blissfully ignorant of the origins of American Football.
My lawn is open to anyone who wears one of the "UTL" jerseys.
June 9th, 2011 at 1:48 PM
#139
Well done sir
Looking forward to your lawn party
June 9th, 2011 at 2:15 PM
#140
The width of the stripes
Makes all the difference. And I seriously doubt that any of those stripes were highlighter yellow.
June 9th, 2011 at 2:50 PM
#141
While we're at it...
...how about some Block M jerseys?
1891 Team Photo (I hope those are white and not maize!!!)
1892 Team Photo (threw this one in because it includes George Jewett, first African-American player on the team)
1895 Team Photo
1901 Team Photo (bonus -- w/ FMFY!!!)
People need to think back to an earlier era. That's where our tradition started.
June 9th, 2011 at 3:24 PM
#142
Are the block Ms shirts
Are the block Ms shirts really "jerseys"? I think they're varsity sweaters - when they played they wore the leather vests (possibly over shirts with stripes!). Note that in the 1901 photo, the shirts with shoulder pads (presumably game wear) don't have a block M. In none of those photos do you see block M chest and sleeve stripes on the same man.
The night game jersey is an unfortunate conglomeration of the styles, I think. Just stripes or just the block M would look better (Plus there will be helmet numbers from the 60's too!) As it is, too busy.
I actually kind of like the photos with the wide striped sleeves and a padded leather vest with a block M above the left breast. That would be a good look I think - wide stripes on the shoulders with a block M above and to the left of the chest numbers, where the number is on the as-designed jersey. Basically, swap the numbers and the block M on the chest and make the stripes wider.
June 9th, 2011 at 3:26 PM
#143
I'm not sure how
I'm not sure how representitive of the game jerseys those old team photos are. I'm not sure the tradition of being photographed in your game uniforms had taken hold yet.
June 9th, 2011 at 4:43 PM
#144
Well, they are wearing padded
Well, they are wearing padded knickers, cleats, and shoulder pads in many of the photos - I'm assuming those items were part of the uniform. But the block M turtleneck sweaters lack the features of "equipment" - no padded shoulders in the early 1900's photos, no vest in the 1890's photos (however in 1892 and on the guy in the top left corner of 1895, it does look like the block M is being worn over some degree of padding). I'd guess those were varsity sweaters. Then again I think "uniform" wasn't that uniform back then (e.g. different players may have worn different gear based on position / personal preference).
The main point I was making is that "large Block M on chest" and "rugby striped sleeves" have never appeared on the same uniform, and combining them looks lousy. I think one or the other would look a lot better.
June 9th, 2011 at 4:32 PM
#145
Not sure, but
in the 1901 photo, at least one of the players is wearing the M sweater over a padded shirt. I think it's possible they did wear the M as warmups, over the padding, etc.
We need some game photos from that era! Here's one from 1902:
Don't see any block Ms. The caption at Bentley is:
Michigan captain "Boss" Weeks about to stop Ohio for a short loss. 1902 game at Regents Field, Ann Arbor
Notice Ohio is wearing striped jerseys under the leather vests (like the Michigan captain in the 1899 team photo, see below) -- gotta think it was a common away-game look.
June 9th, 2011 at 4:52 PM
#146
Interestingly, the mix of
Interestingly, the mix of vests/sweaters seems a common theme in team photos from this era. Here is 1890 Harvard:
Stripes were also common. Here's John Heisman (YTH) in his 1891 uniform:
June 9th, 2011 at 5:40 PM
#147
And here's the 1901 team in the first Rose Bowl (1902)
Michigan looks to be running the same play as Ohio in the above, just a lot more effectively:
Still no Ms visible. They are wearing them in the photos from the parade (before the game, I think), but not on the field. Kind of a "dress uniform," I guess.
June 9th, 2011 at 3:31 PM
#148
Notice the striped socks in the 1895 photo
Yikes!
Notice also the striped lines of stitching on the shoulder padding of the 501-0 (1901) team -- probably also part of the inspiration for the stripes.
June 9th, 2011 at 3:16 PM
#149
To say that this is is
To say that this is is unprecedented is simply accurate, because I don't see this jersery used in any of the pictures you posted. Sure, it has elements from previous uniforms, but this exact jersey hasn't been worn before. Therefore it's unprecedented.
I think if the jersey was an exact replica of one of the jerseys in your pictures, instead of kludging together multiple elements from multiple eras, you would have more people on your lawn.
June 9th, 2011 at 3:24 PM
#150
An exact...
...replica is not doable. All the complainers say we should go back to '60s era jerseys. That makes no sense because there's no appreciable difference. To throwback, you have to go back to the 20s and earlier. You can't have them come out in turtlenecks and vests, so you have to kluge elements.
The striped sleeves have precedent. The Block M has precedent. The jersey design is as close as you can get to something that evokes the period between 1890 and 1920. You know, that period when Michigan won a shit ton of national and Big Ten/Western Conference championships and when the coach was FMFY.
June 9th, 2011 at 3:45 PM
#151
I agree with you, it's just
I agree with you, it's just they did too much. If they insisted on having stripes and the block M, they should have gone with the vest look where only the sleeves had stripes and the rest was a solid Navy Blue, since the only era where we see striped sweaters coincided with players wearing vests.
