here's one vote for "John Beilein's head in a Futurama jar"
So i figured I'd made a sheet of hockey chants and waste some of my CAEN printing making about 500 copies of these to pass around the student section tommorow.
I saw the Big Chill - Chants thread and saw that not all of the chants were posted or were posted across many comments and figured since I already had it typed up that I might as well post it here.
Feel free to print this out and bring to the game tommorow. I know I didn't put all of the chants here but I filled up a page.
(When the refs step on the ice at the beginning of a period)
BOO!!!!! CHECK THE NET… CHECK THE NET (until he checks it). GET INSIDE (until he gets inside the net). CHECK IT AGAIN (after he leaves the net).
(When State gets a penalty, raise your hand and wave)
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH (until the player steps in the box). SEE YA! CHUMP, DICK, WUSS, DOUCHEBAG, ASSHOLE, PRICK, CHEATER, BITCH, WHORE, SLUT, COCKSUCKER
(When Michigan Scores, after the Victors, Hold up the number of goals on your hand until the announcer announces the goal).
GOALCOUNT. READY. (Count the number of Michigan goals). WE WANT MORE GOALS. (POINT TO THE STATE GOALIE) SIEVE, SIEVE, SIEVE, SIEVE, SIEVE, SIEVE, SIEVE, ITS ALL YOUR FAULT, ITS ALL YOUR FAULT, ITS ALL YOUR FAULT, ITS ALL YOUR FAULT, (Go Blue Chant)
(If State scores. Point to the State Section and chant) UGLY PARENTS
Any time "Temptation" (the football you suck song) is played
"GOALIE!" (Point at M's goalie)
"SIEVE!" (Point at opponent's goalie)
Repeat every beat of the song until it is over
Hey (Goalie), you’re not a goalie you’re a sieve, you’re not a sieve you’re a funnel, you’re not a funnel you’re a vacuum, you’re not a vacuum you’re a black hole, you’re not a black hole you just suck, you just suck, you just suck, you just suck
If you can't get into college go to state! If you can't get into college go to state! If you can't get into college, then you really really suck! If you can't get into college go to state!"
(verse 2, if you can’t get into state shoot yourself. Verse 3, if you can't shoot yourself re-apply)
With 1:04 left in a period:
(4) HOW (3) MUCH (2) TIME (1) IS (0) LEFT?. (after announcer announces the time left) THANK YOU!
(If State’s Goalie takes off his mask) UGLY GOALIE (Repeat until he puts it back on) YAY!!!
(if our Goalie takes off his mask) HANDSOME GOALIE (Repeat until he puts it back on) AWWW!!
If Michigan is on a penalty kill (we have someone in the box),
YIIIIIIP (when we clear the puck from our half of the ice)
During intermission, try to get the kids on the zamboni to do the following
Wave, Raise the roof, Flap arms like angel, make a butterfly using your hands, then try to get the kid to take off his/her shoe and throw it on the ice.
During the Blues Brothers Dance in the clapping, cycle through the following actions with the person next to you
Front/Back, Up/Down, Left/RIght
At WMU all you have to do to go to a sporting event is to show your student ID and you get in for free, which is a nice money-saver for die-hard fans but doesn't give people a vested interest in being there. That may explain why in the 3rd period with the game tied at 2 a bunch of students left allowing us to move to the front row along the blue line. A lot of people just go to talk and hang out and then leave when they get bored, not caring about the game. I took the same friends to the Michigan-WMU football game this past season and they were impressed at how all the students paid for their tickets, stayed the whole game and paid attention. They liked the sense of community you get at Michigan, which seems to be a far cry from the Western Michigan experience.
The opposing fans were polite enough, the parking lot attendant gave me a lame "No Wolverines Allowed" line as I walked in, and one student said "What are you doing here?" but nothing too hostile. I guess I shouldn't complain about politeness from opposing fans, but it wasn't as wild as I expected after seeing the taunts we at U-M give to opposing fans (ugly parents, If you can't get in to college go to state) or the nasty things I've heard from MSU fans at games there. It was sort of disappointing actually.
Then there was the copying of Michigan's cheers. Whenever Michigan got a penalty they would start waving and then when the player entered the penalty box they would say "See ya bitch, you're a cheater!" My friends immediately turned to me and said 'what do you think of our chants?' I said they got that from Michigan, only ours was more elaborate. They said I'm just being arrogant. They were so proud of that chant. One person said "That chant got us banned from TV by the NCAA, it's the reason our games can't be televised." I said bullshit, Michigan fans say stuff way worse than that 10 times a game and they get on TV all the time, you're not on TV because you're Western (the truth) but that is their legend on campus. After Western scored they pointed at our goalie and said "Sieve Sieve Sieve It's all your fault..." After hearing that I was just offended, can't these kids come up with their own shit to say? That is word for word Michigan's chant. My friends just thought I was jealous of their schools creative genius (I think we took the word "Sieve" from an Eastern school, but we at least improved upon the chant with the "all your fault" part). The only thing I had never heard before was when they spelled out O-R-G-Y "What does that spell? Orgy! What does that mean? Teamwork Teamwork Teamwork" I thought that was alright but they probably got that from somewhere else too.
Michigan won a close game but with Western being a CCHA bottom-feeder, it was a bit too close. I'll take the win, but it was a disappointing experience as the visitor. Walking out after the game I didn't get the feeling of pride I get when walking out of Munn Arena with Michigan gear on after we beat MSU. It was just kinda 'so what'. Hockey is supposed to be the biggest sport at WMU because they get to play in the same league as the big boys. I got the feeling that most of the students there really don't care about their school's sports, and most probably cheer for Michigan or MSU as their primary team anyway.