Which tradition do you think Jim and his family celebrated over the last couple of weeks?
The Harboughs were raised Catholic, but I have a hard time imagining Jim wishing some one a Merry Christmas or good tidings. My money is on Festivus. I have to imagine that he would love the Airing of Grievances and Feats of Strength. Those sound like the igredients of a typical 49ers practice or film session. Lastly, there are things known as Festivus miracles. I'd say that what he has done with SDSU, Stanford and the 49ers are all Festivus miracles. Before this year, his schedule in December at the 49ers is 11-3.
Coincidence? I think not.
Festivus for the rest of us? Thoughts?
As the bleak, stark expanse of the offseason drags out before us, a cabin fever of sorts has set in, and cracks in the facade of our collective sanity have begun to expose themselves. We've seen a lot of back-and-forth about OT rules and points and cool stories, bro. These squabbles are merely symptoms of the greater conflicts that simmer just beneath the surface.
In that spirit, I declare today to be the FIRST ANNUAL FESTIVUS IN JUNE CELEBRATION. We shall now commence with the airing of the grievances. I will begin.
- Pope Gregory XIII - May was too long. June is currently too long. July is not looking promising. If his Gregorian Calendar was better constructed, we wouldn't be in this mess.
- Ghosts - I feel haunted by the ghosts of a number of coaches from the past. They are less cordial than I was anticipating.
- People who declare things to the the "First Annual" - At this point, it's just "the first." You need two points to create a line. One point is simply "shit that happened today."
- Tyler Ecker - PITCH THE GODDAMN BALL TO BREASTON
- Henri - Enough with the ennui. We get it.
Thus begins my list. There shall be more. Your turn.
Happy Festivus everyone!
The traditional activities of Festivus will of course come later today, but first we must pause to note the Festivus miracles ocurring around us. Specifically:
- The Lions will not lose today
- The 25th of December falls on a Tuesday this year, which means most people get a long (4-day) weekend
- The Mid-American Conference is attempting to trademark the term #MACtion (LINK)
- My ESPN MGoBowl pick-em is in great shape so far
BONUS: You can buy a commercialized version of the unadorned Festivus pole, and it'll cost you 40 bucks for the privilege (LINK). Seems a little antithetical to the spirit of the holiday, does it not?
So how are you celebrating Festivus? Anybody celebrating in "real life"?
It's been 1,384 days since Bo.
I'm sick of 3-9. I'm sick of home for the holidays. I'm sick to death of these ESPN 'experts' claiming that we won't start a new opening day winning streak. I'm sick of Holtz' lisp. Hell, listening to the Toledo game, I'd be just as well not driving back to my home state at the asscrack of dawn tomorrow. We don't have a chance.
I'm sick of ennui. I'm sick of repeated posts about our secondary. I'm sick of seeing a fucking otter every time I get online to check on my favorite distraction. I'm sick of 'There are...' posts. Sick of neg bombs, sick of non-qualifiers and defections. I'm sick of Michigan not being a powerhouse, sick of being an afterthought. I'm sick to my stomach.
Tomorrow is a new day. The first new day since four interceptions. The first new day since stretching became a crime against humanity. The first new day since wings were earned. And what a day it will be. 65 degrees and windy. Football season.
Tomorrow is a new stadium. It's a new chance. For our team. For Brock. For our program. It's a chance to make room on the bandwagon, not only for those 'experts' at ESPN, but for the 49% of Michigan Stadium that has lost their faith. That yearns for 6-6. Tomorrow is a new beer. (I finished all of mine early tonight, so as not to miss the alarm...)
Tomorrow I will get free water, a really expensive program, and an opportunity to lose my mind the first time I hear The Victors.
Our players are scattered throughout Ann Arbor. They're more pumped than we are, most won't sleep. The chip on our shoulders is a whole fucking block to them. Each and every one of them carries it like Atlas. If the Freep angers us, it must turn their entire world red. They will be ready.
So will I.