brown-bag-wrapped bottle of whiskey
Found a gem this morning from one of Wisconsin's student newspapers:
However, there was a shocking development while the Wolverines were in the process of cutting down the nets at Cowboys Stadium. NCAA President Mark Emmert informed Beilein and his team their win against the Gators would be vacated due to the recent findings of improper benefits given to several players, including All-American sophomore guard Trey Burke.
According to a source inside the locker room, when Beilein asked Emmert who was responsible for turning the Wolverines into NCAA authorities, Emmert said it was none other than Fab Five members Juwan Howard, Jalen Rose and Chris Webber.
And then later:
“We’re the original Fab Five, and nobody will ever duplicate what we had in Ann Arbor,” Webber said, pausing to take a swig of his brown-bag-wrapped bottle of whiskey.
Well played, Daily Cardinal.