"Though I received no official response to these sophisticated and elegant tweets to the Illini Athletic Department, I would like to think that Beckman spent the evening prank calling everyone in Illinois named George McLellan and then ordering an absurd amount of hats off an internet haberdashery to hoard in his home's hat annex."
A friend and I were commiserating about the 'Bama loss via email, then the conversation turned to this:
[Perenial rant about how we are becoming Notre Dame and how I am powerless to stop it]... However, DO NOT underestimate The Beard.
Yes, it would be a mistake to underestimate Mealer and His Beard. ElliotMealersBeard.com is available. It is yours for the taking.
$8 later, done. What to do with it now?
You don't "do" anything with ElliotMealersBeard.com. It grows on its own.
But seriously, what do I do with ElliotMealersBeard.com? I don't really have the time or creativity to give The Beard it's full due, and I'd hate to see it linger, like a dead folicle on a less manly man's face. So sad.
Right now, as you can see, I just have it set up as a Tumblr, with a photo that I think really gives you an idea of the inherent power of The Beard and it's potential. What could you do with That Beard? Please tell me how you would make it grow. Right down there in the comments.
Act quick, before Gilette gives him a million dollars to shave it on live TV at halftime of the championship game, in which we certainly will not be playing.