glenn robinson hates backboards too
Welcome to Let's Remember Some Games (RIP Deadspin), a series in which we remember some games. It's self-explanatory. There's no criteria for the order, sport, date, or anything else; if a game strikes our fancy, we're gonna look back on it. Today's choice: Michigan basketball at Illinois, March 4th, 2014.
The Backstory
the backcourt was as good as the shorts were bad [Fuller]
In the final week of the regular season, Michigan traveled to Champaign with a chance to clinch the outright Big Ten championship for the first time since 1986. Despite their run to the national championship game the previous year, John Beilein's team wasn't a lock to get here—they'd lost Trey Burke and Tim Hardaway Jr. to the NBA, then injury cut short an expected breakout season from Mitch McGary in mid-December.
Nik Stauskas and Caris LeVert proved a formidable lead duo, however, bolstered by a strong supporting cast featuring Glenn Robinson III, Jordan Morgan, a freshman Derrick Walton, Spike Albrecht, Jon Horford, and freshman gunner Zak Irvin. Stauskas was in the running for Big Ten Player of the Year.
Illinois, meanwhile, bounced back from a 2-8 start to Big Ten play after second-year coach John Groce—two years removed from knocking off Michigan in the NCAA Tournament as Ohio's head man—settled on a rotation that worked, particularly on defense. The Illini had moved into fringe tourney contention with three straight victories, most recently upsetting Michigan State at the Breslin Center, and they'd held their previous four opponents below 50 points. To add to their motivation, this game was their Senior Day, and it drew a national television slot on ESPN.
It'd be a shame if they got embarrassed in front of a national audience. A real, real shame.
[Hit THE JUMP for, well, you understand foreshadowing.]
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The Question:
An exercise shameless stolen from someone who shamelessly stole it from someone else:
You're playing NBA Jam and have to pick 3 #badgers from the Bo Ryan era. Who ya got?
— Phil Mitten (@hoopsmarinara) March 13, 2018
(Stole this from @tedvid)
You get to pick three Beilein-era players for your NBA Jam team (two starters, one sub). As a bonus, you get to pick an unlockable player from the pre-Beilein era. For those unfamiliar with NBA Jam, this video should give you an idea of what we’re looking for here—there’s a strong emphasis on athleticism, dunking, outside shooting, blocking, and shoving other players to steal the ball.
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Seth: My favorite part about this topic is that there is a non-zero chance one of our readers can actually reprogram an NBA Jam rom for us.
Alex: There are eight stat categories: speed, 3pt, dunk, pass, power, steal, block, clutch.
Ace: I’m taking Caris/Stauskas/McGary/Rice, fwiw.
slackbot: 
[ED: We’ve been programming secret auto-replies into our group IM system. If we trip a keyword, slackbot will interject itself. –seth]
David: Wait...is this a thing? I was at lunch.
BiSB: /WAITING FOR PLAYER DAVE. HIT 'A' TO START.
David: Let me plug in my Game Genie first.
Brian: This should be a draft.
Seth: Our readers do love it when we draft fantasy teams.
Ace: …he said, after I got halfway through my writeup.
Brian: Ok never mind.
Alex: I think a draft would be sensible as well.
Sorry, sorry I'm tryi--
Brian: Ace can go first because he's upset.
David: How many ppl are involved?
Ace: I’m always the bad guy.
/giphy diva
ty giphy
David: OH MAN
Seth: I'm sure that has nothing to do with how you sit in your lair and giggle all the time.
Ace: I actually am working in the basement right now.
Alex: I don't really know where I would put this in the post, but would like to mention it: Stella's in Grand Rapids—a whiskey bar with probably the best burgers in the city—has an arcade section with the OG NBA Jam game. It's as great as it sounds. Shout-out to Stella's.
@adam Catch me at Stella's sometime to get that work from the Stockton-Malone Jazz.
Seth: Our house rule was you couldn't take the Jazz.
Alex: That was just the first team that came to mind - I was going to be courteous and let him use the Pistons. I guess I'll go with the Hardaway-Mullin Warriors. I DON'T PLAY WITH THE STACKED TEAMS IN 2K I SWEAR!
Seth: Draft order:
Seth: I really didn't want to go first damn my eyes.
RULES: It's a snake draft, 3 rounds of Beilein players only, and a fourth round for a secret unlockable character.
BiSB: Then the 4 unlockable players are all in the 4th round Deal?
Seth: YES
Ace: cool
David: fair
BiSB: Seth, Venric Mark is waiting...
[After THE JUMP: HE’S ON FIIIIIIRRRE!]
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Stop! Have you considered you may not have to do this? [Fuller]
Always something to complain about.
Now that Stauskas has escaped from the Lilliputians and the offense has duly gone back to Brobdingnagian, are there ways to get the defense performing, say, at a top-50 instead of 100-ish level? 75? Or do you think at this point they just are what they are?
Ace: I think the Indiana game, despite the win, rid us of any notion that the defense will have a postseason breakthrough. The Wolverines are who we thought they were: a superlative offensive team with some major defensive issues. Michigan couldn't stay in front of Indiana's guards, failed to get back in transition—including after multiple made baskets—and had to go to the high-risk 1-3-1 for the entire second half to create enough empty possessions to somehow win while giving up a 66.3 eFG%. The Hoosiers entered the game with a 48.0 eFG% in conference play. That's bad, mmmmkay?
So, yeah, the defense is an issue, and projects to be going forward. Michigan was a much better defensive squad last season, and while they gave up a respectable 0.98 ppp in the NCAA Tournament, that figure swells to 1.03 after excising the first weekend. Also, that run featured the unleashing of Mitch McGary, Embodiment of Chaos, and this year's squad doesn't feature anyone with his ability to force turnovers, which proved key in the run to the title game. (Caris LeVert leads this season's squad with a 2.2% steal rate; McGary was at 3.4% last season, Trey Burke at 2.8%.)
With Michigan preparing for a potential three games in three days, followed by a prep week for the tournament that's likely to be geared more towards rest and scouting than working on defensive fundamentals, I don't think they're going to come up with a magical solution to the myriad defensive issues. The offense is capable of carrying this team into the Final Four. That's a good thing, because that will have to be the case if we're going to see a repeat of last year.
[jump…preferably before the shooter does]
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