Technically 11 plays but I tied two of them so I could squeeze an extra play in.
I had 22 different wins to choose plays from so this was much more difficult than the Indiana version. But as usual, feel free to make fun of my rankings, agree, or choose which plays you would have ranked instead.
Gotta go through with bets...
I came across a really interesting article this morning and thought it'd make a good read for everyone here. A recent former Oregon player (who is currently anonymous) decided to take in his first ever game from the stands, and wrote a piece about it and the awful fans he had sitting around him.
He raises some really good points about some bad behaviors many fans have when they are disparaging their team from the stands, and I have to say I completely understand his point of view. Maybe we can learn something from this and reflect on how we act when we take in a Michigan game.
TL;DR version - don't be an asshat in the stands, you never know who may be sitting nearby.
Didn't see this posted yet, but apparently Fitz is vocally continuing the "Little Brother" meme.
Toussaint had a modest 50 yards rushing in his only victory over MSU, so I'm not sure why he felt the need to say this.
Now that I'm back in the states and am able to attend the games, I've seen some pretty disturbing things; the "you suck" chant (Just chant the damn Down Number, if we stuff them on 3rd down, chant "4TH DOWN!", if we stuff them on 4th down, chant "1ST DOWN!"), nearly losing to Akron, nearly losing to Uconn, actually losing to Penn St. But I do love football, so I'll try to get tickets to saturday's game in E. Lansing. I must be a glutton for punishment.
What that means is I won't be able to get on here and bitch about the game until several hours after it ends. So this diary is to get all my bitching out of the way beforehand. I'm not a psychic and all predictions are guaranteed to be incorrect. So if I betray any pessimism, consider it a chance for the team to prove me wrong.
Things that will probably happen before the game:
1. I will have to ask about 20 people before I can get a good price on a ticket.
2. Someone will bring up Dickhead Gholston. Which doesn't matter much since he's long gone.
3. Someone will bring up Dickhead Narduzzi's quote about "60 Minutes of unnecessary roughness". Which does matter because that's how his defense plays.
4. MSU's Band will bring out their fake wolverine mascot.
5. MSU fans will be annoying. Conveniently forgetting anything that happened earlier than 5 years ago.
6. I might refer to the Sparty mascot being gay, not that there's anything wrong with that, and how if he wants to marry Brutus, they could elope during the Rutgers game.
Things that will probably happen during the game:
1. We will not be able to run conventionally. Period. Unfortunately, Max Bullough seems to be the real deal. Remember 27 yards on 27 attempts? This game could be that bad, at least on a yards-per-carry basis. Hopefully we won't have as many attempts. I'd be ecstatic if we threw the ball 60 times and rushed 15. That ain't gonna happen.
Denard Devin will be good for at least 3 turnovers, probably two picks and one fumble. And he'll have two or three sacks, at least one of which is caused by his reverse spin and loses 15+ yards.
3. Funchess will make an amazing play, and then we'll be frustrated the rest of the game as he mysteriously disappears.
4. The Sparty defense will be jumping our snap count and we'll take major tackles for loss because of it.
5. Devin will rush for at least 80 yards and two TD's.
6. Gallon will get 100 yards receiving.
7. Spartan players will take cheap shots that aren't flagged.
8. One of our offensive linemen will get injured.
9. MSU will put together annoyingly long drives because we won't be able to stall their running game on 3rd down.
10. MSU fans will be annoying. Some fat idiot will yell "CHEATERS" whenever a flag is thrown. A brazenly foulmouthed pre-teen will get dangerously close to being slapped by me. That's just how they raise their kids.
11. Jake Ryan will save the day.
Things that will probably happen after the game:
1. Bipolar coordinator love will swing to the defensive side, Mattison will again be a genius and Borges will be on the hot seat. This will of course have everything to do with playing MSU instead of Indiana and not actual merit. (But yes, if we can UPGRADE Borges after the season, we should.)
2. Both fan bases will be upset with the referees. MSU will have about 4 pass interference penalties called against them, 3 of which spartans will think are ridiculous. Meanwhile I'll be able to freeze-frame 8 other instances that should have been called P.I. or defensive holding but weren't.
3. MSU fans will argue that any personal fouls called on them or other dirty plays that weren't flagged were somehow justified. Insert your own non-sequitur here. I'm partial to the idea that you should always beat up frat boys while wearing ski masks, because you know, "they had it coming".
4. If MSU wins, they'll probably win the division. If we win, I'll complain about how the division title is determined by conference record instead of division record since we'll probably lose to Ohio and have our only two losses being to the other division.
5. Win or Lose, something will be set on fire in E. Lansing.
6. MSU fans will be annoying.
Points of Quantum Uncertainty:
(aka, things that will swing the game)
1. Weather. The forecast calls for 40% chance of rain. With our dependence on the passing game and pass blocking, I'm guessing the more moisture, the worse for us.
2. Connor Cook's passing. Somewhere between 3.5 yards per attempt and whatever the hell that was last week will probably determine the game.
3. Al Borges the mad magician vs. Al Borges the stubborn coach looking for a new job. Self explanatory. (If you see Fitz catching wide open swings and screens, it could be a good day.)
4. The refs. THROW THE DAMN FLAG.
5. MSU Defensive scoring. We'll probably turn the ball over a few times. But will those be turned directly into TD's or will Mattison get a chance to make Connor Cook look like Andrew Maxwell?
1. Our basketball team looks good.
2. I hate cold weather.
3. I hope they didn't screw up Ender's Game.
4. I'm gonna do a Native American dance for sunshine and clear skies on Saturday. So like, an 'anti-rain-rain dance'.
Congrats you sniveling morons, you're on the verge of driving him off. I'd say 90% of you know way less football than you think you do and that's generous.
Space Coyote, as anyone who follows him on Twitter knows, literally breaks down the X's and O's of a game faster than anyone out there. Insanely intelligent.
My suggestion is to shut up and read. Literally the first time I've ever heard him driven to cursing.
This constant, idiotic, bull shit attitude where about a dozen people look at things Borges says and twist it, act like he's stupid and doesn't know shit, is really, really annoying. Someone the other day bitched about Hoke saying "most teams have 4 base runs and 4 base passes". "Haha, how stupid is that? How much are our coaches out of touch, eh?" Well guess what, most teams have about 4 base runs and 4 base passes.
People on this thread bitching about "we'll lock into some plays". Guess what, every coach at this level will lock into some plays. Why is it stupid for Borges to say, "alright, I don't want my college QB to get into a chess match with one of the best DCs in the country?" Why is it stupid to think Michigan's OC, that has tons of experience, might have a better idea of what's going on? Why is it, that if Borges calls a pass play that has a single high beater to one side and a two high beater to the other, that he needs to have DG have the ability to check out?
People are bringing PSU nearly three weeks after it happened and still don't understand shit about what happened despite the attempts by some to explain "maybe it wasn't the greatest, but it was far from the worst. Very far from the worst." People keep bringing up "27 for 27" and don't even understand what half of it fucking means, don't understand the game situations that corresponded with it, don't understand that Borges in fact called 14 runs to RBs in the first 54 minutes, which if Michigan weren't trying to eat clock at the end, amounts to a very modest 17 runs in the game.
And then people use a bunch of BS logic. "How many QBs does Borges have in the NFL?" How many has Tressel had? Maybe Pryor? How many does Rich Rod have? Zero? How many does Meyer have? One from his Utah days? What the hell does this even have to do with successful college QBs? But let's bring up how a RS FR, for the first time ever, won the Heisman. Then lets disregard any actual knowledge of anything. Did he check into better plays? Did he run the offense against Alabama? Why are we comparing our QB to maybe the best QB in college football as if that is exactly what Michigan's QB should always be because it's the way it is in your NCAA football game.
But no, it's way too much credit to think an OC that's been in the game has even a functional knowledge of football. I think that the people that think this is his first time seeing a football game since he played Tecmo Bowl as a child are on to something. Oh God he's so fucking stupid that half the posters on here know he's an idiot and see things and understand things he has no idea about.
Honestly, this is getting beyond annoying. The posters here, at least a lot of the outspoken ones, are complete fucking morons that think because they are outspoken they are right. Maybe I should take a break from these boards, from these sites, and let it just degrade into idiocracy. Because I'm sick of every thread even tangentially about Borges turns into this "Hurrr duurrrr Borges dumb, he don't even know that you no can run out of formation not called spread". The wave of stupidity and ignorance mixed with unentitled arrogance that has washed over the board is overbearing. I don't mind debate, I don't mind different opinions, but opinions stated repeatedly time and again without even the effort to have any damn clue what your talking about, and then ignoring people that try to say "wait a second" time and again is exhausting.
Am I done here? Yeah, I think I'm done here.