I saw this Instagram from Kenny Demens regarding a set of UM gears and stickers as gifts. I do not think we are sending it to all former players -- too expensive. It must be going to players from last year. Nice gesture.
So, I've finally been able to work my way through HTTV 2013 - available for the low, Lowe price of $15.00 at the MGoStore. A great read, one I highly advise others to partake in before the season if possible. It's filled with updated depth charts, position-by-position breakdowns, coach-speak, heartfelt discussions about past, present, and future players, and lots more.
But the most interesting part of the magazine, at least to me, is the sheer number of unexpected revelations about the team, UM in general, other B1G programs, and college football in general. Heck, there are even some stupefying revelations about the MGoCommunity.
Now, major spoiler alerts and all that, but I tried to compile the most shocking tidbits the writers unearthed this year and have listed them below. I welcome others to add to this list, as I'm sure I missed a couple of things.
- Denard Robinson did not in fact injure his arm in Nebraska; he simply wanted to usher in the Gardner era earlier than expected so that fans, opponents, the fambling public, etc. could get a taste for 2013 and beyond.
Jake Ryan did not tear his ACL in the offseason. In fact, he was serving as Chris Hemsworth stunt double in the new Thor movie.
- Drew Dileo isn't white, he's clear, and this transparency allows him to elude LBs and DBs more easily.
- One of Greg Mattison's goals before he speaks with the departing seniors is to review all of the gametape he has for that player in order to provide a comprehensive account of how that team helped UM while on campus. When watching Jordan Kovacs's film, though, he sometimes noticed that the rest of the players in the secondary were seemingly not on the field, as he saw only one set of cleat prints on the field against teams like VT, NW, and MSU. When Mattison asked Jordan about this, Kovacs simply replied "That is when I carried you." And then he disappeared...to Miami.
The cinematic masterpiece Sharknado was not inspired by the fever-dream delusions of a meth-addled screenwriter or a collection of Reddit users, but by the epic 2011 contest between UM and MSU. Ian Ziering has already reserved his seats for the 2013 game in preparation for filming Sharknado 2. In his words, and I'm amazed tiny microphones are this sensitive, "I'm only going to be able to feel that real sense of dread and terror of utter despair by experiencing the 2013 MSU football season in all of its wind-tunneled glory."
So this, but with sharks!
- Al Borges used to love running screens on offense, but then this happened and he seriously doesn't want to talk about it.
- In a bit of meta site news, 99% of the funny things posted on the site are from Lloyd Carr's graduate student sweat shop he runs in Fort Schembechler. The other 1% come from all the lawyers and engineers up in here!
- Brady Hoke's golden poop will be used to finance Rutger's entire athletic department until 2020. Mark Dantonio offered his tears to fill the Rutgers swimming pool but Mark Dantonio doesn't cry ever because he's totally awesome brah.
- In anticipation of the Wildcats possible Run for the Roses this year, hedge funds and medical schools across the country are being advised to expect applications from Northwestern to be delivered promptly and immaculately, because nobody cares about NW football.
- Even 3 years after The Process, the stench from all of the dead horses buried in the MGoBackyard remains as pungent as ever.
- Much has been made about Urban Meyer's current time at OSU, but HTTV delved a bit deeper into his past to help divine the potential future for the Buckeyes. What they found was the *shocking* revelation that Meyer's Evil Doppelganger Rural Kroger was actually the one running the Florida program some years ago, only Urban didn't want to say anything because it just seemed like a huge hassle. Also, he has no recollection of Aaron Hernandez meeting with Doc Brown and being on the Hindenberg, an iceberg in the middle of the Atlantic in 1912, or in the room when they greenlit Batman & Robin.
Great Scott! Giving him the keys was a bad idea!
- The MGoBlog phone apps secretly record you pooping, Jeremy. So knock it off with that thing we talked about during group, okay. It's really weird.
I know, really interesting stuff. I'm sure I missed things, so I welcome people pointing them out in the comments. Seriously, though, but the book. It's good stuff.
EDIT: Well, this went over well. Ah, bring on the Neg Bang. I'm man enough for it.
If this is too off topic for NO OT season then feel free to delete, but it is about the NCAA and college football so I think it fits.
Basically, Bilas called the NCAA out on its own hypocrisy, and as a result, the NCAA disabled the search function on its online shop. Pretty hilarious stuff if you ask me.
I was in Ann Arbor a week and a half ago, and spent part of one day with friends at their home. While our wives and children were talking and playing, my host took me around town to see new buildings on the main and athletic campuses, and a few other things in the area.
Our first stop was only a couple blocks away: he showed me the progress on the building of Coach Hoke's new home, which looks close to completion. (I had my camera, with a telephoto, but didn't feel like taking pictures and wouldn't post them anyway.) Regardless, the house looks very nice, and is only 10 minutes or so from the athletic campus. Without going into any detail, I couldn't see Hoke building a home like this without a commitment to stick around a long time. Although I don't know square footage, it also looks like there is plenty of room for Brady & Laura to entertain, and to welcome family for game weekend sleepovers.
Another friend happens to be members of the same church where Mattison (and Hoke?) attend. They ended up chatting briefly with Mattison because my friend's wife was talking to Mattison's daughter, and admiring his grandchild, when he came up. They wouldn't have felt comfortable intruding into Mattison's personal space, but he was the one who came and talked with them.
The long and short of this post is that the coaching staff is around for the long haul. I just can't see Mattison leaving his family . . . his wife would shoot him! And I suspect he is too much of a coach and having too much fun to retire anytime soon. As for Hoke, we all know the "this is Michigan, for God's sake" meme. He, and all his staff, are home where they belong. I'm looking forward to Hoke continuing as coach at Michigan for many years. We as Michigan fans are extremely fortunate to have him and his staff.
Rothstein even snagged a couple of good quotes from opposing B1G DB's on how effectively our receivers block. I really should pay more attention to this facet of the game. I think it's highly underrated, and it certainly doesn't often make the highlights.