also duty-free guys falling over and grabbing their shins
It's been over 12 months since this story about Harbaugh and BathroomGate, but I still find it hilarious. I imagine a massive HD screen to watch film and a high-tec X's and O's white board right next to the shitter.
From August 2009:
The Stanford athletic department is facing a multi-million revenue shortfall. Fundraising has cratered. Team budgets are being sliced. More than 20 jobs have been eliminated through layoffs and buyouts, and at least one sport (fencing) is in danger of being cut.
So by all means, build the football coach a private bathroom.
Harbaugh's response to austerity measures:
“It was something I’d asked for,’’ Harbaugh said. “It cuts down on drag.’’
$70,000? I don't care what anyone says, that is going to be one nice bathroom to spend lots of time.
The following is a "documented transcript" of a recorded conversation between Rich Rodriguez and David Brandon: As an MGoBlogger who believes in the importance of other random mgobloggers having access to the truth, I'm publishing this conversation's transcript:
RR: Hey David, you said you wanted to see me?
David Brandon: Yes, yes come on in, have a seat… are you hungry?
RR: I think I’m alright, Rita’s making her famous Nacho dip tonight for an appetizer, and you know how she gets if she finds out I’ve already eaten…
DB: Yea yea, I know... why get Domino's when you have Nacho Dip at home, i get it.
RR: Yeah, I mean I’m more of a Pizza House kinda guy but your point stands…
RR: That was a joke, tough crowd! Is it me or is it getting hot in here?
DB : Ah, good one Rich! You had me there for a minute!
RR: Anyway, you wanted to see me?
DB: Yes, I had a question for you, and I need you to answer honestly.
RR: You know me David, I’m a straight shooter. Say, would you turn the AC on or something, I’m boiling over here.
DB: Well… my question for you is, do you think I look like Chris Fowler?
RR: Well, not really, but if you did, I’d say like a more established, successful version. Nothing against Chris Fowler, he’s nice and all, but if there’s any resemblance, I’d say he looks like you, not the other way around.
DB: Good point! Thanks Rich, I knew you’d give it to me straight.
RR: Anytime. Seriously, it’s hot in here… I’m sweating like a sinner in church over here… are these seats heated?
DB: Haha, so you’re feeling like your seat is hot, ‘eh?! Get it?
DB: It’s a joke! Yes, I’ll turn down the heat on your seat...new amenity I installed. Listen, I know what I’ve told the media, but really I’m just having fun with them. Particularly, those clowns over at MGoBlog. Have you ever been on that site?
RR: Me? Nah, David you know I don’t listen to any of those bloggers... all that stuff is poison, but it can’t hurt you if you don’t swallow it.
DB: Agreed, but if you’re ever on it… my handle is profitgoblue.
RR: Handle? Listen, I know you’re going to do what’s best for the program, and I respect your decision, no matter what it is. Just know, that from day one, I've tried my best to become a Michigan Man, and I want to be here for the long haul, and win championships here at Michigan.
DB: Well, thank you Rich. Come over here though, and check this site out, seriously.
RR: Ah, alright.
DB: How about this thread “Could DB have possibly done worse here…” Let me click on that one… WHAT? Captain Obvious doesn’t trust me? He DISLIKES me? Ahhh… let’s skip this one… let’s go to one that’s about you…
RR: I really don’t think we should concern ourselves…
DB: Ah, c’mon, it’ll be fun! How about this one?
RR, DB: Boobies!!!
DB: Who is that?!
RR: I think that’s the girl who sings that California Girls song. My daughter loves her!
DB: I love her too but geez, they remake every song nowadays...
RR: Hey David, I’ve got to head out now before I’m in the dog house… are we all set here?
DB: Yes, but before you go, just know one thing… The job is yours, and that hasn’t changed at all in my mind at any point this season. Just promise me one thing… promise me you’ll help me by putting an end to this chatter. Quite frankly, it’s tiring.
RR: Next year…? I’m only focused on our next bowl game… but believe me, you will not regret this. You're going to be a big part of something special. Have a good night Dave.
DB: Night Coach.
I have seen several people comment that the bowl game is make or break for RR. I can't see how the bowl game makes much difference. Our bowl opponent has yet to be determined and could be either very tough, mediocre, or somewhere between. The main arguments for replacing RR: bad defense, losses to rivals, 33% winning percentage in conference will not be changed by a bowl victory. The main arguments for retaining RR: improvement, youth/inexperience, offensive genius, etc. also will not be changed by the bowl result. I have to believe that DB has a good idea about what he will do and is just checking with his subordinates and being sure he is not too hasty in his decision. Also, like an NFL receiver in the end zone, AD's must complete the process or any decision they make will be void.
For those of you that have been waiting, below is an official copy of the Prohibition on Coaching Change Posts Act of 2010. For those of you that are predisposed to comply with the terms of the Act, I suggest printing the below and posting it in your cubicle, office, dorm room, or some other location where it can easily be referenced. This act was codified on November 30, 2010 but is always subject to further revision. Please let me know if you see any glaring issues that need to be addressed. Thank you in advance.
The Prohibition on Coaching Change Posts Act of 2010.
Article 1 - Notices
(a) Notices of MGoInfraction shall be "filed" by Profitgoblue as soon as practicable after a violation of this Act.
(b) Notices shall be in writing and shall specifically (i) explain the violation, (ii) inform the offender of the fine levied, and (iii) inform the offender of their opportunity for appeal.
Article 2- Infractions, Defined
(a) Thou shalt not, under any circumstances, discuss Jim Harbaugh in connection with the Michigan head coaching job unless and until Rich Rodriguez has officially been relieved of his current contractual obligations.
(b) Thou shalt not, under any circumstances, lobby for or otherwise argue in support of the firing of Rich Rodriguez until at least the end of 2011.
(c) Thou shalt not, under any circumstances, speculate, opine, or otherwise comment on Dave Brandon's decision timeframe with respect to the head coaching and/or defensive coordinator job(s).
(d) Thou shalt not, under any circumstances, post a personal opinion with respect to whether or not Rich Rodriguez will be fired.
(e) Catch-all provision - additional infractions can be identified at a later date by Profitgoblue in his sole discretion.
Article 3- Penalties
(a) All violations shall carry a minimum fine of 1 MGoPoint, issued by Profitgoblue, with a maximum fine to be determined by the MGoCommunity at large.
(b) Fines are subject to waivers as more fully described below.
Article 4- Waivers
(a) Waivers of Application of the Act - posts that would otherwise be deemed violations of the Act can be excused by formal, written waiver issued by Profitgoblue in his sole discretion.
(b) Waivers of Levy of Penalty - posts that are deemed violations of the Act shall be cited by penalties can be excused by formal, written waiver issued by Profitgoblue.
Article 5- Appeals
(a) All MGoInfractions will be final determinations unless a formal, written appeal is "filed" within twenty-four (24) hours of the initial notice of the infraction.
(b) All appeals must be "file" by posting a reply to the initial Notice.
(c) The merits of all properly-filed appeals, as well as all amicus briefs filed on the offender's behalf, will be considered by Profitgoblue in his sole discretion.
(d) If successful on appeal, the MGoPoints deducted by Profitgoblue will be restored.
(e) If unsuccessful on appeal, the MGoPoints deducted by Profitgoblue will be lost forever. However, a mandatory restoration of MGoPoints shall occur if the ruling on appeal is sufficiently negged.
Disclaimer: This is my opinion. And for the record, because the decision to keep or fire Rich Rodriguez is completely out of my hands, I no longer have an opinion on the subject. I trust the people in charge and will go with whatever decision they make. Unlike most of these other diaries, this has no statistics. They just aren't my thing. I warn you, this is long. It is basically my rationale for being rational. Take it for what it is worth... Thanks.
After the Ohio State beatdown, I was angry and wanted RR fired. Sunday I was too angry about the Wiki Leaks guy so I cooled down a little bit. On Monday, after seeing Denard Robinson win the Big Ten Offensive Player of the Year award, I've cooled down significantly and am looking at things more rationally, but not delusionally by any means.
Rich Rodriguez has done a terrible job coaching this team his first three years. When his WVU DC wasn't coming, he should have kept Ron English because he doesn't know shit about defense and/or the Big Ten. Ron English wasn't the greatest DC, but he was young, had energy and the respect of the kids that we had. RR should have adjusted his offense to Threet's talents, but he either didn't know how or was too stubborn. Then comes Tate, played well but he was a Freshman - what did you expect? Then Denard played flat out amazing but still he was a first year starter (Who won Big Ten OPOY). The defense? Can't honestly say Greg or Shafer are terrible coordinators or RR is a moron for forcing a system and staff upon them (or both). Either way, the entire coaching has failed when it comes to tackling. Every football player needs to know how to tackle with proper form. Offense on turnovers, special teams, and obviously defense. That is a fundamental. RR needs to give up on his defense philosophy and fire his friend Tony Gibson. On special teams, the kicking game is partly RR's fault, but Gibbons was a bust. Hagerup is great. Poor tackling on returns - that is mostly on Tony Gibson and partly on the other coaches for not teaching this fundamental football move. I don't know if they break down special teams film to look at teams blocking schemes on special teams, but uh, it didn't look like it. The injuries in 2010 really hurt, especially on defense and in our run game. Red zone turnovers by a first year starter at QB really killed us in some of those games, too.
It's a real conundrum we are in. Fire him and somewhat start over with a new guy, although I think the transition wouldn't be as bad as 2008 with a coach that isn't as stubborn as RR. Or say that for the first time, we have a returning QB that has proved he is electric. A stable of great WRs and RBs, many who are upperclassmen. Solid OL. Solid incoming recruits. Defense returning from an injury plagued year with many young players that had on the job training and game experience that will have an entire new staff running their own that is actually effective in defending Big Ten offenses (that is a MUST if RR stays). If RR can't handle an autonomous defense, then he is not all in for Michigan and should be fired. You want to build the best program in America right? Then bring in the best Defensive Coordinator and Staff you can find and let them do it their way, the same way you do it with your offense.
I pity David Brandon for having to make this decision. It basically makes or breaks his legacy as an AD. (And could have an impact on his political future, who knows.) Fans, media and former players all calling for the coach's head. Does he succumb to their demands? Does he see what I stated above and say "One More Year?" If he gives him another year and we have great season in 2011, he is a genius. T shirts will be made, "Patience is a virtue? No - David Brandon is patience." If we flop, he is a chump with no credibility.
In 2008 when Rich Rodriguez was hired, there were people who didn't like him. 3-9? More people didn't like him. First NCAA violations in program history? More. 5-7? More. 7-5 with poundings by Big Ten's elite? Even more. And it's hard to argue against those people, it has not been pretty or fun by any means. And then there are the people who stood by the coach no matter what, because he was the Michigan coach. As long as they always pulled for Michigan to win, these groups are the same - just passionate Michigan fans with strong opinions. And today, there is a supposed divide amongst the Michigan faithful. FIRE HIM NOW and WAIT AND SEE. These groups are also one in the same - one views the glass half full, the other half empty. The WAIT AND SEE group is no doubt angry with the way this coach has mismanaged and poorly coached his way into a hole in the job of a lifetime and straight up dragged Michigan through the mud. With all the drama and losing the past couple years, they still ask for patience because they want to see where this thing goes when some stability is involved (minus the defensive coaches =)..) The FIRE HIM NOW group wants to...well..FIRE HIM NOW. And you can't really blame them for feeling this way after the past few seasons. At the same time, as much as they were saddened, angered and frustrated by watching the games we lost, they can't tell me that they weren't thrilled watching Denard Robinson go apeshit on Notre Dame or the defense coming through in 3OT against Illinois. I know you can argue that all the wins, yards and points came against lesser opponents, a back-up QB at ND and vs. UCONN, Bowling Green. You can argue that we played close games against bad teams. (We did, FCS UMASS 42-37 are you kidding me?) You can argue that we were not even close in any of our losses, and that most yards and points came in on clean-up duty defenses. Once again, you are probably right. You don't even have to argue about the defense. However, you can't argue against the fact that our offense has shown flashes of being unstoppable and that the defense was plagued by freak injuries that forced inexperienced players, young and old, to play in games they had no business seeing the field in. We are stuck between a rock and a hard place. If you want the coach to stay for one more year, you should be able to support him and still agree that he has done a horrendous job thus far and excuses about the cupboard being bare aren't applicable anymore. You should demand he stays away from the defense. If you want him fired now, ask yourself this question. If you could turn the page and take a peek as to what 2011 holds for Michigan Football with Rich Rodriguez, would you be curious enough to take a look? If you would, then maybe your mind isn't as made up as you thought it was.