I did not make this headline up
(Below contains information provided by a very good friend, someone who is much more proficient in counting, charting, and general attention-paying than me. Credit should be given where credit is due (to him) and criticism should be given where criticism is due (also to him). I consider myself to be a mere conduit of information because he was too Notre Dame (read: chicken) to post this himself and apparently wants to remain anonymous...).
We are a colorful bunch. From all different walks of life and across the globe, we gather to learn, discuss, and follow Michigan football in the Fall. We read and then watch and then read some more. Some of us even read WHILE we watch. And so it goes every week in the gameday open threads. Aside from the love (and sometimes hate) we all have for Michigan, we have at least one more thing in common . . . our use of curse words. That is the topic of this thread:
In the Akron open threads, we contributed 131 "fuck"s to the discussion (113 in the first half, 18 in the second half). That number was bested in the UConn open threads, which saw 165 "fuck"s (118 in the first half and 47 in the second half).
The use of "shit" trailed our clear preference of the word "fuck" (as "shit" is clearly not as effective as "fuck" in certain situations requiring a more nuclear reaction). We had 59 "shit"s in the Akron threads and 46 "shit"s in the UConn thread
Interestingly, the use of "suck" was much more prevelant in the UConn threads (102 in the first half, 12 in the second half) than in the Akron threads (65 in the first half, 5 in the second half), which is interesting because one might hypothesize that Michigan sucked equally in both games.
The use of "damn" in the two threads was pretty consistent, it only being deployed 23 times during the Akron game and 20 times during the UConn game. However, much more alarming is the increase in the use of "put in Morris" from the Akron thread to the UConn thread - almost 20 more people want to see Gardner replaced this week than they did last week (25 versus 8, respectively).
For your viewing pleasure, below are exceprts of open threads from the past two weeks:
What, you may be asking yourself, does all of this mean? It means we are a very colorful bunch. Colorful and extremely NSFW, NSFMrs.K, and NSFChildrenUnderTheAgeof16. So, on behalf of all you fathers that let your young children read these threads:
Hey, shitheads, please stop fucking swearing in the goddamn open game threads or they're going to put in Morris, which might very well suck!
Lot of games went down tonight. Tough break for the Lions (I am a Browns fan), but they made plays and were fun to watch.
Northwestern kicks off in the Cotton Bowl against Texas Tech in the Ticket City Bowl of Dallas at noon.
Wildcats are +9.5. Underdogs have really come on strong against the spread over the last three days. I'm not sure what to expect with NU's backup, but I'm sure we'll get a solid dose of TOUGHNESS and GRIT.
Red Raiders are lead by Tommy Tuberville who is ditching the air raid for a coach from Wisconsin. Don't know what to expect from them either.
Game is on ESPNU.
Florida(-5)/Penn State, MSU/Alabama(-7) start at one.
I hate scrolling through long open threads. I'm expecting a bit busier thread for OU/Nebraska. We're starting a new one.
The final three automatic qualifiers are named tonight.
FSU vs VT (-4.5)
OU vs Nebraska (+4.5)
UCONN (+2) vs USF
My picks are above. Jamiemac has upsets across the board.
Ranked(!) Northern Ilinois takes on Miami (NTM) in the MAC Championship on ESPN2 tonight. The Huskies of NIU enter at 10-2 with one of the best rushing attacks in the nation and one of the best defenses to boot. They're 17.5 point favorites tonight.
Miami is 8-4, but went 7-1 in MAC play. They aren't very good on offense, ranking 40th with 243 passing yards per game and 114th in rushing yards per game at ~96.
Over/under is ~55. Despite the wide spread, I'm not confident in either way. I'm liking the under, though.
The second game of the night is Illinois(-5) and Fresno State. We're familiar with Illinois, and Fresno State is as expected. They are a rushing heavy team, but their stats aren't very impressive. Defense is also WAC-ish.
Normally those notes on Fresno State would lead to an easy cover for an BCS-AQ team. Not the Illini. They have a habit of making this closer than it should. FSU also gets up for games like this, especially at home. Tough call.
I'll take Illinois to cover. Over/under is 58. I'll take the over. The two teams posted 105 points last season. They aren't as explosive on offense this year, but we should still see plenty of points.
Arkansas vs Mississippi is on ESPN. Baylor/Oklahoma coming up on the deuce. Three other games on ESPN3 of no import.
Army vs Notre Dame at the football field that can fit it is on NBC. Tom Hammond may have a new profile photo to replace the previous one:
You ABC Map: