good luck with that
10/11/2014 – Michigan 18, Penn State 13 – 3-4, 1-2 Big Ten
OONTS OONTS OONTS OONTS
Songs designed for da club have one over-arching theme: tonight. Buy another drink, raise it to the sky. The OONTS OONTS commands you. Feel the beat. The beat is inside you. Tonight is going to be a good night, says the worst song ever written. The people around you accept this and so do you. Your sky-drink is empty. You are commanded to buy another. The OONTS OONTS doesn't care if you vote or do your homework or wake up tomorrow with a gremlin jackhammering at your temple. It commands you to see only what is in front of you now.
What is in front of us now is a lady named Victory. She is… well… she's a little ragged. Makeup's smeared; eyes are a little twitchy; you don't want to know the Vegas over/under on how many times she will throw up in the cab. Because she will do that, in the cab. Because there is going to be a cab.
Tonight, we go home with Victory.
Michigan put it all aside. There is no one to credit here; I found out a long time ago that pushing large groups of people in a direction is impossible. To lead is to find yourself at the head of a tidal wave hoping it won't notice your tiny course corrections. The people are the direction.
And except for a third of the student section that was momentarily absent because of malice or apathy—impossible to tell—the people showed up, were as into it as can be expected of people watching two cows rub against each other threateningly, and were happy to win.
After the game a section in the south endzone unfurled a section-wide FIRE BRANDON banner; that was about right. Michigan fans have for the most part held their fire on players, held their fire for the portions of games in which Michigan can win. When things get out of hand or are just intolerably incompetent on the staff's part, they let their feelings be known. They have in fact been as good as an enormous amorphous mass of pissed-off people can be at aiming before firing.
They're still mad, because they should be. This kind of win over this kind of team is just more of the same, and the athletic director's futile gestures towards humanity are the definition of too little, too late. But tonight is tonight and tomorrow can be dealt with later.
Devin Gardner put it all aside. A guy who'd been moved to wide receiver because the coaching staff thought more highly of Russell Bellomy. A guy whose ribs are a fine paste after last year. A guy who got benched for Shane Morris because the coaches had lost faith in him. There is a guy to credit here.
He's going to be a footnote, now, no question. All hopes and dreams of being a towering colossus have fled. He won't have Navarre's redemption story, and unless something deeply bizarre happens he won't have an OSU win. Ten years down the road mention Devin Gardner and most Michigan fans will wince involuntarily and offer sympathy.
This is especially cruel on the heels of his predecessor. Denard was a tragic hero but he got his OSU win, his BCS bowl, and anyone still trying to be disappointed with him after what happened when he left is certifiable. Ask a Michigan fan about him in ten years and it's different. A lot different.
But that's tomorrow, and tonight the guy who's had his leadership questioned since he arrived is going full Novak on his sideline to WIN THIS FUCKING GAME. He limped out on the field because that's just what he does. Probably can't even throw right unless several different areas of his body are telling him to go to the spa immediately. Rod Gilmore's screaming that he shouldn't be in the game because Rod Gilmore is incapable of telling a head from a leg—not that we are at all surprised by this revelation—and Devin Gardner is just like I put my heart in this shit.
Heart only gets you so far. It gets you to a narrow win over a Penn State team starting a broken vacuum and a Teddy Roosevelt biography at guard. We appear to have a vicious all-day hangover scheduled in two weeks. But that's for tomorrow.
Tonight, we are in a cab and squinting and feeling pretty okay, because we've got something to hang on to.
DEVIN GARDNER I PUT MY HEART IN THIS SHIT POINTS OF THE WEEK.
1: Devin Gardner.
2: Dennis Norfleet.
3: Devin Gardner again.
[After THE JUMP: don't start thinking about tomorrow. Oh no we did.]
News bullets and other items:
- Ondre Pipkins was dealing with “something” and should be back soon
- Willie Henry was dressed but didn’t play; he’s injured
- Hoke said any of the dressed QBs could have played, but read between the lines re: Morris and being injured
- Devin Gardner had a boot on his left foot after the game but said he’d be ready to go against Michigan State
- We talk about injuries a lot for not talking about injuries
- Penn State broke away from their tendencies in the first half. Hoke praised Mattison and the defensive staff for adjusting before the second half.
- Hoke again praised Matt Wile’s kicking and Devin Gardner’s leadership
“It was- obviously it’s always good to win. We’ve had some tough times and tough weeks but the resiliency of our football team, the resiliency how they go about every day in practice and the hard work that they put in paid off. It wasn’t pretty at time but I don’t know if anything’s pretty all the time and what they did, though, is they played together, they stuck together.
“We had some guys who were banged up obviously, and that’s just part of football. If you’re not banged up then you’re really not playing, but we’ve got guys who are tough. We’ve got guys who understand what it is to play as a team and play for each other and play for Michigan, and I’m excited about for them as much as anything [that] they stuck together.
“Also, the environment, the crowd; there’s no place better in this country when you have a game like this than Michigan Stadium. I can tell you our kids, they feel it. They feel it when those people are there cheering for them, and those students that were there, the former players coming back and supporting those kids; you don’t get that at a lot of institutions or maybe any institutions like you do at Michigan. Very excited for our kids. We’re going to enjoy it and then we’ll get back to work next week on Tuesday and Wednesday.”
Could you talk about the play of the defense in the second half, and then the winning plays at the end there?
“You know, I think a couple things: Penn State had a week off and as most teams do, you have a week off [and] you start looking at tendencies. You start looking at things that maybe have patterns to [them]. The first half they broke some tendencies that they had, so I think Greg and the staff defensively did a great job at half time. I think our kids had a will, and they willed themselves to keep going and it was pressure on the quarterback with a four man, three man rush that really worked out pretty well and maximum coverage. And part of that is that he has to hold the ball a little longer, and we got off the field on third downs which in the first half we really didn’t as much.”
We all saw Devin [Gardner] pacing the sidelines and grimacing and looking like he wasn’t going to get back in. Talk about him coming back in the game and what he showed you and what he gave you.
“Well, Devin’s leadership has been outstanding, and he played a game a year ago with a broken toe for half the game so you know he’s a got a toughness to him. He is turning in, through his maturation process and everything else, into a tremendous leader. He was cheering the defense on when they were out there and he just wants to compete and play and the trainers said, ‘Yeah, he can go.’”
[More after THE JUMP]
Throw out the records. Ignore the lack of offense. Forget that Penn State's offensive line looks eerily like Michigan's 2013 O-line.
Michigan won a game tonight in front of a packed house of genuinely excited fans, and it felt damn good. Maybe not for much of the game, an ugly slog in which the two teams combined for just 470 yards of offense, several Wolverines went down with injuries—including Devins Gardner and Funchess—and both coaching staffs seemed intent on out-bungling the other, but come that final drive, it felt like Michigan football should.
The stars of this game, without a doubt, were on defense. The Wolverines limited PSU to just 214 yards, with a paltry 65 in the second half after Michigan came out a little flat against the run. Six different Wolverines accounted for the team's six sacks. Jourdan Lewis came up with a critical second-half interception when the defensive front nearly got to Christian Hackenberg again, forcing an ill-advised throw across the field. Mike McCray anticipated a fake punt and displayed tantalizing athleticism in hawking Grant Haley to blow it up two yards behind the line.
When Penn State needed a field goal to tie with 3:44 left, the defense came through with their biggest possession of the night, as Jake Ryan and Frank Clark sacked Hackenberg on consecutive plays to force the Nittany Lions into punt formation from just outside their own goal line. PSU coach James Franklin bizarrely called a timeout to avoid a delay of game—one that would have cost his team about half a yard—before making the correct call to take a safety and go for an onside kick.
What happened next perhaps made up for the blown call at the end of last week's Rutgers game. Penn State recovered the initial kick, but a questionable flag for offsides negated it, and Blake Countess fell onto the ensuing re-kick without any trouble to effectively end game.
In feelingsball world, however, the star of this game was Devin Gardner, who recovered from a bad interception and an ugly-looking ankle injury to engineer the game-winning field goal drive. Gardner's numbers didn't look great—16/24, 192 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT—but without him on the field for two second-half drives, the offense looked helpless with Russell Bellomy at quarterback. Gardner may be inconsistent—yes, often infuriatingly so—but there's no question he's by far the most capable leader of this offense, and it showed most tonight during his brief absence.
Devin Funchess scored Michigan's lone touchdown of the evening in the first quarter, somehow chasing down a Gardner moonshot and snatching it away from PSU safety Ryan Keiser, who looked like he was preparing to field a punt—after a bobble, Funchess secured the ball and streaked towards the home sideline, arms raised in triumph.
That turned out to be the only touchdown the Wolverines would need, with Matt Wile providing the decisive points on field goals of 45, 42, and 37 yards.
Granted, the running game proved non-existent, the offense remained relatively ineffective, and Brady Hoke gifted Penn State a Hail Mary attempt at the end of the first half by inexplicably taking a timeout with three seconds left on the clock. Those are concerns, to be sure, but they're concerns for another day.
Tonight, we celebrate. Hail to the victors, valiant.
remember when pepper spray felt bad?
By Heiko Yang
Both teams are in their locker rooms discussing how they can win this game in the second half. James Franklin is apologizing for not having watched film this week even though he acted like he had. Brady Hoke is clapping his hands.
It’s halftime for Dave Brandon, too. There are empty seats in the stadium and he’s hurting. People can only believe that attendance is above 100,000 for so long before they notice that half the students are missing. He’s wondering whether he should force his entire staff to wear maize and sit in the empty seats in the student section. And they’re all scared, because young people are frightening and they sing “Temptation” all wrong. What is the meaning of “you suck” and to whom does it refer?
The people of Ann Arbor know a little something about sucking. We got used to losing to Ohio State during the late Lloyd Carr years, and then we got used to losing in general under Rich Rod. We thought we hired the right guy to pull the program out of mediocrity, but now we’re sucking again.
We’ve seen too many tough games, disappointing play calls, and times when we didn’t know WTF was going on. At times it seems like the coaches have lost their minds, like when they don’t know how to defend the spread, when they play Cam Gordon at free safety, or when there are only 10 men on the field to cover punts.
But after those trials, we all rallied around what went wrong, got on the internet, and complained all at once. Because that’s what we do. We find a way through tough times by posting on the message board. If we get negged, we neg back. If we get banned, we head over to Scout.
All that matters now is what’s ahead. How do we fix the offense? How do we fix the defense? How do we cover punts? How does Devin Gardner survive going back to East Lansing?
The basketball program is showing us it can be done. What’s true about them is true about the football program: the University of Michigan can’t be knocked out with one punch. It takes crippling NCAA sanctions, terrible recruiting, and a decade of mediocrity, but even then we get right back up again and when we do the world is going to hear the roar of Trey Burke after he hits a game-tying three against Kansas in the Sweet Sixteen.
Yeah, it’s halftime, Ann Arbor. Basketball season is about to begin.
(... In a month.)
Michigan 13, Penn state 14
By Nick RoUMel
For every sports fan, there comes an iconic moment when you realize: Oh, How The Mighty Have Fallen.
For my dad, it was a baseball game, many years ago. The Pirates were hosting the Dodgers. A man who would later be inducted into the Hall of Fame, for his storied career, was due to bat. But the PA announcer intoned, “Now pinch-hitting for Duke Snider …. Gordon Windhorn!”
How could my father ever forget that name? How could I? Gordon Windhorn, who batted 108 times in the Bigs and managed to hit .176, was sent to bat for the Silver Fox, the Duke of Flatbush, the future Hall of Famer. Oh how the mighty had fallen, and my father never felt the same way about baseball again.
The Duke. Gordy.
My own Gordon Windhorn moment was about Michigan football. Lloyd Carr had retired, and Bill Martin was doing his level best to bungle the search for a successor. He offered the job to Greg Schiano, the coach of Rutgers.
Michigan was, and is, the winningest program in college football history. It should be a dream destination job for any coach. But Schiano - the coach of Rutgers fergodsakes! – turned us down.
Since then, the list of coaches who have rejected Michigan has grown like hair on Nick Jonas’ back. Depending on what source you want to believe, the following have all told our AD’s, “Sorry, I have to go to a quilting bee with my mother” (actual Counterpunt date turndown quote): Les Miles, Jim Harbaugh, John Harbaugh, Pat Fitzgerald, Gerry Faust … OK not Faust. He sold his soul to check out the quilting bee:
For Penn State fans, their Gordon Windhorn moment had to be the firing of Joe Paterno. His stunning fall, after half a century of gridiron success, is something many fans are still struggling to comprehend. The Jerry Sandusky scandal captured the nation’s headlines for many months, and as NCAA sanctions loomed, there were questions whether their football program would ever recover.
Although for very different reasons, and by no means morally equivalent, Michigan and Penn State are two programs that have endured crises. It was once taken for granted that certain football powers were forever secure, but schools as iconic as Notre Dame, USC, and Florida State, among others, have weathered storms.
Michigan too will be back. It is now a dark time, but just as the lights will illuminate the chilly October evening sky for our first ever Big Ten night game, they will once again shine over The Team.
It starts tonight, as two old fighters square off for a return to glory. I believe the one with 110,000 fans in his corner will survive a split decision. Gordon Windhorn, you can return to the dugout. We’re not done yet.
MICHIGAN 16, PENN STATE 13
|WHAT||Michigan vs Penn State|
Ann Arbor MI
October 11th, 2014
|THE LINE||Michigan -1|
|TICKETS||Starting at 32 bucks|
|WEATHER||clear, 0% chance of rain
50 dropping to 40 by 10
Penn State is probably not real good. They've got offensive line issues up the wazoo, they beat a middling-at-best Rutgers 13-10, they escaped UCF with a last-second field goal. I guess I'm sayin' there's a chance. Vegas is saying there's a downright fair chance. When it's all tied it up it's anyone's game as long as they're there to make plays, right?
PROBABLY IN: Taylor, Funchess, Wilson, as all played last week.
MAYBE: Shane Morris, who Michigan dressed last week in a classic "nuh-uh" move.
Erik Magnuson is reaching the timeframe where he may be available after his rumored high ankle sprain, but it's more likely he waits until after the bye week.
PROBABLY OUT: Delano Hill, Derrick Green, Jabrill Peppers, Desmond Morgan.
Run Offense vs Penn State
Michigan showed signs of life against Rutgers, going for 5.5 yards a carry without anything particularly long. Tiny flags were waved across the ramparts of Ann Arbor
Now Penn State wheels the big guns in. Michigan is staring down the barrel of this:
None of these teams are good at running the ball—Akron is in fact highest in YPC at 58th. And Michigan is shockingly proficient in statland, 32nd in YPC thanks to steamrolling Appalachian State and Miami (Not That Miami). But at this early juncture a big chunk of PSU opponents' ranking comes from facing PSU, and the Nittany Lions lead the country in YPC allowed at 1.99. They can say YOU DON'T WANT THIS and the right answer is probably "yessir."
A quick sanity check of their personnel reveals that they should be pretty good. Ace:
The defensive ends also played quite well. RU's right tackle couldn't handle the size/speed combo of SDE Deion Barnes, who looks very capable of producing a similar mismatch against Ben Braden. WDE CJ Olaniyan is also quick around the edge, though he did get blown off the ball a few times against the run; that didn't burn PSU much in this game because of Zettel.
Hull is the standout in the middle of the defense, and while neither of the outside linebackers are at his level, they cover a lot of ground sideline-to-sideline against both the run and the pass. Wartman missed last weekend's Northwestern game with an arm injury but is expected to be back on Saturday—he practiced in full pads on Wednesday.
These guys are all experienced upperclassmen even after the offensive line was forced to raid the DL for both starting guards this offseason. There's not a whole lot of depth, as this is the year Penn State's sanctions bite most deeply, but they've been plenty good enough to boot opposing offenses off the field quickly enough to stay fresh.
These guys are legit, and that should be alarming to a Michigan unit that overpowered a small Rutgers front last week but threatens to be overpowered themselves this weekend.
Key Matchup: Tackles versus ends. Michigan's weak point meets Deion Barnes and CJ Olaniyan, and since it only takes one messed up block to blow up a play…
[Hit THE JUMP for a GIANT MACAQUE terrorizing THE STREETS OF BANGKOK this is NOT A REFERENCE to ANY PLAYER it's just WEIRD]