"Northwestern fans can be both heartened and disheartened by the loss to Minnesota just like how nineteenth-century resurrectionists were heartened when they pried a heart from a freshly-buried corpse and then disheartened it when they sold it to a disreputable anatomist."
Oh, yeah: TAMBINPO has chimed in on the Roundtables in better-late-than-never fashion. The goal is to spread Nowledge (sorry, Joe) throughout the blogosphere, and he's the only Texas (state of, that is) guy who's responded so far so his perspective is worth examining.
No permalinks, though. Run, lest it disappear.
Dammit. Jaren Hayes is the last (non-Wolverine) person I wanted to see suspended, but there it is... "suspended indefinitely" for what is rumored to be a fight with a teammate. Unless this was a vicious thing I don't expect he'll miss much, if any, time, but it certainly sounds serious.
State is desperately thin everywhere on defense. Hayes being out means that State will likely be starting a JUCO transfer or true freshman in his place.
Blue-Gray Sky has a post up on Notre Dame enemies which requires some addressing, as Michigan features prominently on the list. Now, they're good guys over at BGS but they're clearly delusional after the last ten or so years of utter irrelevance. Three points:
First. Desmond Howard, is dubbed a "one-hit wonder," which is not true. There were two additional hits in the Desmond Howard career, one against Ohio State and then a Super Bowl MVP performance. In between he was a valuable, underrated contributor to many teams as a returner who never lived up to the hype. He was one of the best of his generation at what he did, but everyone concentrated on what he wasn't instead of what he was. Thus he is closer to De La Soul than Vanilla Ice. Desmond is also claimed to be a "poor man's Rocket Ismail," to which I only have this and this to say.
Second, there's a reference to Lloyd Carr's hypothetical "boobs." Let's review...
This is Coach Carr:
Notice that he apparently can stand under his own power. Also the number of chins is easily in the single digits. Also note no detectable mammary activity.
This is Charlie "Bigger than Christ" Weis:
"Bun yo kabuk noni Notre Dame."
Sorry about the rather standard cheap shot, but no references by Notre Dame fans to quote-unquote "man boobs" are acceptable. That is Blog Revolution-level Pot-Kettle-Black. That's like a Michigan fan criticizing some other team for losing road games against Pac-10 teams, if it was done in a fashion befitting a sixth grader. A retarded sixth grader.
Third, BGS forgot Notre Dame's main enemy:
There's no BCS, there's just me.
The Inexorable March Of Time. It's been 12 years since Notre Dame finished in the top ten of any poll. The only success over the past 24 years has been under Lou Holtz, who cheated at Minnesota, cheated at Arkansas, cheated at South Carolina, and cheated at... yes, Notre Dame, unless you are really, really naive. Now over a decade removed from the slightest whiff of relevance, Notre Dame is the nation's capitol for faintly racist white wide receivers... so I guess they've got that going for them. Willingham left the program in a shambles, and in a few years when Weis finds out that he is not, in fact, the BEST COACH IN THE OOOONIVERSE, he'll probably go on a shooting rampage and die in six to seven electric chairs.
Let's see... 99% white private Catholic school in the whitest part of White Supremacy: The State that now hopes to hit up the Insight Bowl every two or three years or so if they've had a really good season and plays USC every year. That is a recipe for a National Championship Game played on January 4th, Never Friggin' Ever Again.
Notre Dame fans wanting to see a legitimate title contender are hereby advised to get cranking on those time machines because if you don't see kids limping around with polio at sometime in the near future the chances of ever seeing that unlikely occurence again are reading zero.
Comparison: Death. He's coming for you. There's nothing you can do to stop it.
And now a followup to the Bruce Feldman/Myron Rolle/Tom Lemming hootenanny from a bit back. Teddy Greenstein has an article in the Chicago Tribune today about the Lemminator that makes two things really clear: he drives a lot and he inappropriately advocates certain schools over others.
Lemming has taken a bunch [of flak] since the July 4 edition of ESPN the Magazine, in which Myron Rolle, a top cornerback recruit from New Jersey, said, "Tom Lemming is a huge Notre Dame guy. He kept saying to me, 'You know they have a great coaching staff. You know Charlie Weis is Mr. NFL. You're an academic guy. That place is for you.' Then he killed Florida State. He said, 'You're stupid if you go there.' Um, OK. Thanks."
Lemming has a different recollection of his conversation with Rolle, which occurred during a high school scouting combine.
"I never said he'd be stupid to go to Florida State," Lemming says. "He's a 4.0 student and wants to be a doctor. I said, 'Do yourself a favor: Look at how many kids have gone on from there to become doctors.' I do that with all kids. I ask them questions that make them think.
"I say, 'Forget football. Go to a school where you can get a worthwhile degree.' People might think that means I'm pushing kids to go to schools like Duke, Notre Dame, Northwestern and Vanderbilt. I can see where some schools could get upset by that, and I have to watch myself. I'm very careful about mentioning names of schools now."
I guess this qualifies as an attempt to defend himself. He's gotten in trouble in the past for pushing certain schools for academic reasons. His big fix for this problem is apparently implying things instead of stating them directly, which fools exactly no 4.0 students who want to be doctors.
And then there's this gem about the ESPN/Lemming breakup:
Lemming, meanwhile, was miffed that people had to pay a premium to read his rankings and on-line chats on ESPN.com.
Because it's all for charity, kids! Bleah. That sentence, accepted uncritically, lowered the credibility of the story significantly in my eyes, coloring everything around it with the aura of a buddy-buddy quid pro quo thing going on. The story is a puff piece designed to make Lemming look good, but in it he basically confirms the allegations leveled at him.
Speaking of horrible losses to inferior teams when holding an eighteen point lead, one for the Where Are They Now Files:
That's former Illinois scatback Rocky Harvey scoring for the Fort Wayne Freedom in their recent 45-20 romp over the Tupelo Fireants of the United Indoor Football League (motto: "When the Arena League Cuts Your Ass").
Hat tip to Dangerous Logic, who has more Freedom-Fireant pictures.